Your husband and your hair.

MommaTrish

MommaTrish

Well-known member
(Or significant other...)

How much weight do you put into their opinions on your hairstyles? Every winter I get a crazy hair (ha! pun) and want to fiddle with my hair. Generally I go with dyeing my hair some obnoxious shade of red or I cut it all off. I've managed to avoid it, but for the past week all I can think about it wanting to do something about it. Preferably cut it short again, I think it looks better short. John however absolutely HATES my hair short. He doesn't ask much, but he did ask that I not cut it short again. But... I kinda really want to cut it. I'll probably settle with just dyeing it again and maybe doing layers - but I want it short dang it.

So, do you actually take your other half's opinion on what you do with your hair?
 
Nope, I don't. Generally, he doesn't really voice his opinion on my hair, and I've had everything from pixie cuts to bobs to long hair. He's always told me I'm beautiful with every haircut, but I know he prefers it long.
 
I figure...it's my hair. I'm going to do what I want with it!!!! But then again, I've never been really drastic. My hair is always on the shortish side, but never cut really really close. I think he would actually find it fun if I did something a bit on the wild side (like put a pink streak in it) because I'm usually rather conservative with it. ;) I've considered a pink streak before, but the one who freaked when I mentioned it was my 8 year old son!! :D
 
I used to never bother what he thought, but lately I've taken it into consideration a little more and I have no idea why. Maybe because I wish he'd consider my opinion on his clothes or hair, ha!

kristijoy said:
I figure...it's my hair. I'm going to do what I want with it!!!! But then again, I've never been really drastic. My hair is always on the shortish side, but never cut really really close. I think he would actually find it fun if I did something a bit on the wild side (like put a pink streak in it) because I'm usually rather conservative with it. ;) I've considered a pink streak before, but the one who freaked when I mentioned it was my 8 year old son!! :D
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I want pink too!, lol! I keep thinking maybe it could be a reward if I EVER reach my weight loss goal.
 
My ex partner (the dad to all 3 of my kiddos) used to hate me dying it bright colours even if it was a bright version of my regular colours (red, purple) and said that I shouldn't do it because he likes it my natural colour which is a really dark brown. I basically stopped dying it until we split up and then I took the plunge and went all the way to blonde and it felt AWESOME! Since then I've been allsorts of colours. Blue, Pink, Turquoise, Lilac, Purple, you name it, i've had it! I don't know what it is but I feel like "me", the proper me when I have super bold coloured hair. I'm so much happier when I'm funky colours and I'll hate it when I'm old and have to stop. Haha :D

Anyway, the moral of the story isssss... DO WHAT YOU WANT! ITS YOUR HAIR! :D
 
My husband hates me coloring my hair because he's already gray and he doesn't color his. With the style, he keeps his mouth shut.


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None.....he has no say. I basically come home with my hair shorter every time I get a cut. He really doesn't care though. He figures it's my hair.

Plus, I was raised by a really strict step-father that didn't allow me to cut my hair. My hair was always to my butt. When he and my Mom separated I chopped my hair off....like pixie cut short. I will never again have someone tell me how to have my hair. :p
 
Asking my hubs opinion is pointless, he just tells me to do whatever I want if it makes me happy. I on the other hand would kill him if he made changes without running it by me.... a few weeks ago he shaved everything off his face.... we've been together for 15 years and I have never seen his 'naked' face.... I told him I'd leave him if he ever did it again! At least now I know I am in no way attracted to clean shaven men at all. LOL It was actually an eye opener, cause everything changed... I had zero feelings for him from the second I saw no facial hair.... it sounds very shallow I know, and I never in a million years would have thought it would have that kind of effect over me, and I really hated that I felt that way :( .... it is finally growing back now, and the more visible it becomes the more feelings are returning back to normal.... he just wasn't my husband without the 'stache and beard. So with that said, even though I know what he would say to me... I still would want to make sure it was ok first, cause I'd hate for that change to happen to him like it did for me.
 
Nope. I only ask him after the face what he thinks. lol! After I usually get a cut, and come home I will get an opposite answer - "I'm surprised you left it long," or "you went really short this time!" He grew up with his mom and 2 sisters, so I think he knows to stay neutral until he hears if I like it or not, lol! He likes is on the longer side, but if I have to actually "do" my hair daily, then what he likes doesn't need to get taken into consideration.
 
My hubby tells me what he prefers my hair to be (long and down) but if I want to do something, I'll do it. I do take his opinion in mind, but it's not my deciding factor
 
he just says "remember when you chopped it off and cried? that was hard for everyone..." hahahaha! i'm sure he prefers it longer but he lets me voice my thoughts & then chimes in with those kinds of responses. he'll go along with whatever i finally decide to do.
 
I take in account of my hubby's feelings - I value his opinions... but if I wanted to do something drastic, he would be okay with it... with in reason - if I came home, shaved on the side, and a mohawk died rainbow colored, he would probably say something... haha. I do know he likes me with longer hair - and I like longer hair, so it's a non-issue... he is just really thankful that I'm pretty low maintenance when it comes to this stuff. I think he would have a mild attack if I was like I was when I was younger - thinking nothing of spending $200 on a cut/dye every 6 weeks. Now, I haven't had my hair cut (outside of trims that I do myself), in well over a year. :o
 
We both like my hair on the longer side and my natural color, so it works out well. In general I respect his wishes if it's something he feels strongly about, but I don't feel like I need to take his every preference into account.
 
I take his opinion into account to an extent...but that's easy because we tend to agree. He doesn't like short hair, and I don't like short hair on me.

On the other side, he definitely has taken my opinion into account...he didn't want to grow a beard/mustache until I bugged him to let me see him with one. And since I preferred him with, he's left it.
 
I always take dh's preference in to account. He does not want me to cut it and so I don't... but I am pretty old fashioned in the relationship area and roles and things like that, so for me if he doesn't want it cut I have no problem not cutting it and making him happy.
 
britaneejean said:
he just says "remember when you chopped it off and cried? that was hard for everyone..." hahahaha! i'm sure he prefers it longer but he lets me voice my thoughts & then chimes in with those kinds of responses. he'll go along with whatever i finally decide to do.
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HAHA! This is my husband, too. He says, "I don't care what you do with it as long as I don't have to hear about it."

So I cut it off and cried in secret.

I think you should find something fun to do with it besides cutting it short if it really bothers your husband. The itch will pass, and you can always hang it over his head, "Remember how I really wanted to cut my hair but I didn't out of respect for your wishes?" lol
 
I grow my hair long because, he likes it. Then when I get enough for locks of love plus will still have shoulder length hair I chop it. I don't dye it because, I did all that in high school. My hair likes to turn the opposite color of what its supposed to. I mostly wear my hair up anyway. I don't have time nor, the energy to fix it every day.
 
we both like my hair long - but the color changes frequently...he could care less. if i wanted to cut it all off, i'd just do it. he grows a beard every few years - which i don't love, but it's his face...
 
He likes it longer, but when we dated and earlier in our marriage I always kept it above my shoulders and he didn't have a problem with it then. I keep it long because I like it that way, too. But I have been thinking of going back to a short carefree hairstyle. :)
 
My hubby likes my hair longer, but even if I want to chop them short, he doesn't mind. He just doesn't want me to colour my hair, because my hair becomes really dry and coarse and damaged.
Basically, I always ask his opinions before I do anything, but he's quite okay with whatever hairstyles I choose so long as it's not so crazy!
 
I take my husband's opinion into consideration because I'd like him to extend the same courtesy to me ... that goes for most things, not just hair. My hair doesn't change much unless you count a slightly different hue of brown, so there isn't much to discuss, lol. My hair grows incredibly slow, coupled with the fact that it's super curly, so cutting it short wouldn't be an option unless I wanted to wait 5 years to regain the length.
 
emmasmommy said:
my hair. my choice :)
he'd never ask my opinion on his haircut, so, the same works for me.
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This. Nor has my husband ever volunteered an opinion. A guy I work with said that all men like long hair and any man who says otherwise is lying. I almost snapped back and said "then you can shampoo, detangle, style, brush, and deal with headaches and neckaches and backaches for all the women with long hair." If you don't have to upkeep the hair, then you can have an opinion it probably won't count for much in my book.
 
My rule has always been unless he's willing to blow dry and style it for me, he doesn't get a say. :D I always tell him what I'm planning so it's never a surprise but ultimately my choice trumps his since I'm the one who has to deal with it.
 
JennNtheBoys said:
Asking my hubs opinion is pointless, he just tells me to do whatever I want if it makes me happy. I on the other hand would kill him if he made changes without running it by me.... a few weeks ago he shaved everything off his face.... we've been together for 15 years and I have never seen his 'naked' face.... I told him I'd leave him if he ever did it again! At least now I know I am in no way attracted to clean shaven men at all. LOL It was actually an eye opener, cause everything changed... I had zero feelings for him from the second I saw no facial hair.... it sounds very shallow I know, and I never in a million years would have thought it would have that kind of effect over me, and I really hated that I felt that way :( .... it is finally growing back now, and the more visible it becomes the more feelings are returning back to normal.... he just wasn't my husband without the 'stache and beard. So with that said, even though I know what he would say to me... I still would want to make sure it was ok first, cause I'd hate for that change to happen to him like it did for me.
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My dad had a beard my entire life. Then a few years ago he shaved it off. It was SO weird. I've gotten used to it now but I still sometimes picture him with the beard and then have to remind myself he doesn't have it anymore.
 
My DH wouldn't tell me what to do with my hair, but on the other hand, if he absolutely hated it in a certain style, I probably wouldn't want to go with that style. And I hope he would do the same for me.
 
I don't think he'd tell me that I can't cut it, he's just been very vocal since I cut it short last winter how much he does NOT like it short. He actually wants me to grow it back out to how long it was when we first started dating. And he totally does take into account my opinion on his hair and facial hair. lol! I mean, it's to the point that he knows that he's not allowed to shave for a certain amount before holidays, and that if he doesn't want to be too scruffy for church Sunday that he needs to shave on Fridays. He also knows that he can't cut his hair a month before a holiday in case it looks bad so it has time to grow back out.
lol!

He doesn't care one way or another though what I do with the color of my hair as long as it stays in the red/orange range - but then I wouldn't dye it outside of those colors anyway.
 
i'll listen to his opinion but doesn't mean i'll do it. it's my hair, my body. for example he said want me to try to dye it red, but i said nope. take me as i am.
 
I don't discount his opinion but he doesn't offer it freely. It's very convenient because he thinks I'm cute whether my hair's long or short. My hair is crazy thick and grows really quickly, he's more concerned with not listening to me complain about it I think.
 
...My husband cuts my hair, but he does what I ask (I just tell him how many curls to cut off and then we fix up the layers as necessary). Then again, I'll never dye my hair, and I'm not a huge fan of how I look with short hair (I always feel like Jo in Little Women). In fact, he was the first guy I met who preferred my hair curly to straight, so I married him up right away because it saves me so much time and energy to just wear it the way it comes out of my head.
 
I do what I want with mine. I know that he prefers it long but he knows that I will probably never wear it long again. I have freakishly thick hair and when it is long I have neck issues and headaches from it. I've tried wearing it long and having it thinned and layered every few weeks but it is just ridiculous to try to keep up with. I usually cut it short and then leave it until it is just past my shoulders before I cut it again. That's my nod to him liking long hair.
 
JennNtheBoys said:
Asking my hubs opinion is pointless, he just tells me to do whatever I want if it makes me happy. I on the other hand would kill him if he made changes without running it by me.... a few weeks ago he shaved everything off his face.... we've been together for 15 years and I have never seen his 'naked' face.... I told him I'd leave him if he ever did it again! At least now I know I am in no way attracted to clean shaven men at all. LOL It was actually an eye opener, cause everything changed... I had zero feelings for him from the second I saw no facial hair.... it sounds very shallow I know, and I never in a million years would have thought it would have that kind of effect over me, and I really hated that I felt that way :( .... it is finally growing back now, and the more visible it becomes the more feelings are returning back to normal.... he just wasn't my husband without the 'stache and beard. So with that said, even though I know what he would say to me... I still would want to make sure it was ok first, cause I'd hate for that change to happen to him like it did for me.
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My husband and I have been together for 20 years. In December he shaved his mustache for the first time! He had a mustache when I knew him in high school (albeit a very thin, very blonde one) so I had never really saw him without one until now. After I had a bit to get used to it, I've been surprised at how much I really like the clean shaven look on him. My daughter almost cried though and told him to grow it back immediately. I think she is getting used to him without it now.
 
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