Shopping with a 13 year old girl!

LJSDesigns

LJSDesigns

Sweet Shoppe Designer
So I am getting ready to start my third day of school clothes shopping with my 13 year old niece and I am not looking forward to it. Having only the one son, I had no clue girls could be so frustrating! She doesn't know if she likes anything, everything is okay only. She is like a baby crow; if it is shiny we stop and pick it up! She seems very uninterested in the entire thing which makes me feel bad. I thought at 13 they were all about boys, clothtes and makeup! We did have fun with her make over but I was disappointed yesterday when I picked her up to find out she hadn't used any of the skin care products I got her. I hope that wasn't a waste of 100 bucks! I want to make this last day fun and successful! What is the secret to engaging a thirteen year old girl besides dessert? The girl does like her desserts! :D

After reading all that it may be that I sound like a 13 year old myself! She really is a sweetheart but shopping with her is hard. I now understand why her mom asked me to take her! :D
 
Good luck!! I don't have any advice on how to engage a 13 year old... talk about movies or music?

A number a years back I took my SIL dress shopping for her prom... geez, that has tough - I felt so old... "do you really think you want a dress that is that low cut in the back?" hahahah.... and then at the mall eyeing up every guy that walked by... I often wondered if I was that way at that age - I'm so old, I don't remember... :D
 
When I take Destiny shopping (she's 12), I just take her to the store she wants to go to and I let her lead the way. If she seems to like something, I suggest she try it on and we go from there. I really just follow her and watch for her face to show me that she likes it. lol, she is super picky, especially when it's HER money she's spending. ;)
Good luck!
 
so glad..my kids wear uniforms haha

school shopping is the pits i seriously hate it.

Hope you have fun today though!
 
Shopping evidently isn't her thing. I bet she likes something else though (music, video games, karate, sports...). I wasn't a big shopper as a kid...my main thing as a teen was to be comfortable, which wasn't what other girls really cared about. If the styles were just uncomfortable I sure didn't want to wear it. If your neice doesn't feel comfortable or is starting to compare herself to other girls and feeling inadequate (for whatever reason) she will likely find shopping for clothes miserable. I finally found a couple stores where I could feel comfortable in their clothes, so I always went back to those. (and just as aside...not that it might be any of your business...but if she happens to be menstrating, I wouldn't go shopping...you know...you are just going to feel bloated & ugly no matter what you put on).

Even now...in my 40's. I shop quick. Get it over with, just wear the darn clothes and move on to something much more interesting. And now...I"ve come to terms with the fact that I just might NOT have the latest fashion and may look like a dork and hey...it's OK!
 
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Mine wears a uniform too. But when we do go shopping for weekend clothes I let go ahead; i will browse in nearby isles, as soon as she needs an opinion, and she will, she will let you know.
 
Well, my kids aren't that old yet, but I agree with Nikki. I wouldn't give too many suggestions, just kind of walk around and let her point the way. Some kids just don't care about clothes that much though and would be way happier if you just chose some things for them.
 
Do you think she might have some self confidence issues? I know when I'm not liking myself much, I HATE shopping. I have a 12 and 10 year old and shopping was pretty fun this year. I just let them put stuff together and try it on and I would made suggestions or veto things I didn't approve of...but I let them try on whatever they wanted.

Maybe she's not much of a shopper? Yeah, I wish we had uniforms at my girls' schools! SOOO much easier!
 
My 10 year old loves shopping for clothes. Heck, both of my kids do. I don't. Not at all. I don't like shopping for clothes for me or them. I definitely don't like retail shopping as I hate the lighting and the music often playing through the intercom and the crowds. Yesterday we ended up shopping and I was miserable but my girl had fun.

We don't specifically shop for back to school clothes though. We get ONE back to school outfit and the rest of our shopping is just basic shopping throughout the year as needed. It just happened that DD needed some leggings and shorts so we picked them up yesterday along with her back to school outfit. As a kid back to school shopping was overwhelming and I ended up wearing things I already had and felt comfortable in anyway so I don't bother for my kids. They have lots of cute stuff so it isn't like they only have one nice outfit a year. LOL
 
My DD is not really into boys, clothes and makeup. She does like all those things, but I wouldn't say that she's crazy about them. And fortunately, she also wears a uniform to school. I think she is quite relieved about that. There is just WAY too much pressure by the other kids in middle school when it comes to the clothes and makeup.

She might not remember exactly how to use the skin care products you got for her. It may be that the makeup isn't what all the other girls at school are wearing. Or maybe she isn't comfortable with using it yet. That is really okay too.

When I was a kid, going to the mall and going shopping with friends was a big deal, but most of our parents wouldn't let us go there alone or with friends until we were in high school. It is possible she's not used to going shopping. And some kids really don't like shopping.

How about looking at some websites for the shop that you are visiting first? You might want to get an idea for what she likes before you go to a store. OR you could go to a store that she seems to like and buy one or two items to get an idea for size, THEN come home and do the rest of the shopping from that store online, no pressure.

Or maybe she wants to wait until school starts to see what everyone else is wearing before she goes shopping?
 
Whew! We are done! It was a long three days but we got everything she needed. Most of you are right she just doesn't care for shopping or what is in which is fine but makes it hard. I did try just letting her go off on her own but she just wondered around and chose nothing so I had to make suggestions. We had fun the first day and she loved the makeover, she wears a lot of makeup, but three days of it was too much for both of us. Next year my sister and I are going to divide and conquer and each take a day. Maybe it wont be so overwhelming for all of us. :)
 
Glad the trip went well! She may not say it, but I'm sure she appreciates it AND for sure she'll remember that you took her! :wub:
 
tx-nana-scraps said:
My 14 & 16 yo old granddaughters LOVE to shope. Every summer before school starts I take them school shopping and let them pick out what they want to try on, then the big decision of how many things they can buy. Needless to say we have a blast and they look forward to it each year.

They love Rue 21 and Aeropostle so we always go there plus Kohl's, Penneys and Sears. For Christmas we give them gift cards for Rue 21 and Aero.

Next time see if there is an Aero or Rue 21 near you, bet she'd like those stores. Most pre-teens and teens love to shop both places.

Glad your last trip went well.
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She hated both Aero and Rue 21. Took one look at the clothes, said no, and turned and walked out. I thought we had found a place she would like. So wrong.

Thanks for your help and suggestions everyone! Hopefully if we do this again next year, we will all be better prepared for what she likes and where to shop. And we won't drag it out over three days, that is for sure. :D
 
good for you....my only suggesstion would be to break it up over a few weeks instead of 3 days all together (if possible)...sam never really was in to clothes and thankfully always wanted to be comfortable and never wore anythign but mascara :) Abby will be a whole different story!!!!!!!!
 
nun69 said:
good for you....my only suggesstion would be to break it up over a few weeks instead of 3 days all together (if possible)...sam never really was in to clothes and thankfully always wanted to be comfortable and never wore anythign but mascara :) Abby will be a whole different story!!!!!!!!
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That would probably be a good idea, but since she is from PA and I live in IN, my brother bought her for the weekend to shop. Having a time limit is tougher and she was hard to fit. She is a tall girl, a bit plump and has absolutely no rise what so ever, so jean shopping was a killer, but Kohl's Angel brand, super low rise fit her really well, so we snapped up five pairs including skinny jeans in teal. lol

She is a red head so we had to stay away from pinks and red, which I always gravitate towards. She kept telling me, Aunt Lorie, I don't do pink and rolling her eyes. lol

She does like patterns, animal prints and bold colors, so I just kept my eye out for that and went from there. She also has a thing for anything with the Union Jack on it right now. We choose a lot of teal and green which suited her coloring nicely. And we bargained shopped our buts off. We stretched her budget as far as possible and even gave her father some change.

It was a success, I think, but I can definitely wait another year before I do that again. :)
 
Lorie you are an awesome Aunt to do that for her.....I bet she totally appreciates it and I can relate to the hard to fit!! Abby is only 6 and she literally REFUSES to wear jeans cause she is a "butt" kinda girl and does NOT like how they fit on her:D so she wears LOTS and LOTS of leggins...thanks goodness her sister works at Old Navy!
 
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nun69 said:
Lorie you are an awesome Aunt to do that for her.....I bet she totally appreciates it and I can relate to the hard to fit!! Abby is only 6 and she literally REFUSES to wear jeans cause she is a "cutt" kinda girl and does NOT like how they fit on her:D so she wears LOTS and LOTS of leggins...thanks goodness her sister works at Old Navy!
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We found a few things at Old Navy; a really cute hoody and a leopard print tunic. I don't envy your daughter her job at back to school time. Old Navy was a ZOO! :D

My niece would not consider leggins as the boy she likes thinks they are freaky. Really? I rolled my eyes at that! :)
 
the secret I found is patience and lots and lots of options LOL. I love shopping but going with my daughter even now frustrates me to no end. And she is not even a teenager anymore! Ohh it was a nightmare looking for a wedding dress. And I always thought it would be this amazing experience. Every dress I loved she hated and ever dress she loved I hated LOL. Until we were looking at bridemaids dresses and found an amazing gown for 99 dollars which I think was actually a prom dress. It was simple but really elegant, fit her perfectly and looked amazing on her. We both loved it.
 
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