she got jokes...

[LenaGardner]

How did the zen master order his hotdog?
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"I'll have one with everything."


:thumbup:

Okay, humor me. Tell me your favorite joke. (and try to keep it clean?)

 

[Nikki Epperson]

I'm sure you've all heard this -- but I got it from a People magazine from a while back.

A blonde police officer pulls over an elderly, senile woman and asks her for her license and registration. The woman hands the officer a compact. The officer opens it up and says "I'm so sorry 'mam! If I had known you were a police officer, I would've never pulled you over!"

Corny. But it's early.

 

[Jennifer]

I'll have to think, but I'm LOLing at you two.

 

[Nikki Epperson]

and here I thought I was telling a bad one.

 

[Jennifer]

Ok, I wanted to play so I actually looked one up. It's mostly clean.

An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party?"

"Yeah, a costume party," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."

"But you look like Abe Lincoln." protested the barkeep.

"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."

 

[Nikki Epperson]

OMG Jennifer! LMAO!

 

[LenaGardner]

LOL at both of those. I've never heard them!

 

[Amy Carey]

oh oh!! I'll play!

Two rednecks meet on a dusty country road. One of them is carrying a big bag labeled, "chickens."

"Chickens, eh?" says one guy. "Hey, if I guess how many chickens you got, will you give me one?"

"Heck," says the guy with the bag, "iffin you guess right, I'll give you both of 'em."

The other scratches his head and guesses, "Um... five?"

 

[Nikki Epperson]

LMAO Amy! That sounds like my hubby and his twin brother! :blink:

 

[heatherdumas]

I got nothing! But there is coffee shooting out of my nose.

 

[junebug]

hehehe! these are funny! keep 'em coming; i got nuthin'

 

[lizzyfizzy]

ahahahahahaha!!!! i love corney inside wrapper of laffy taffy type jokes.

my fave joke to date, just for it's wittyness.

where did the general hide his army???


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in his sleevey...


ahahaha...get it. ok...so i shouldn't start a comedy act based on that joke?

you can thank my laffy taffy circa 1988 for that one.

 

[kscwgirl]

I can tell you my two yr old's favorite joke.

Where do pirates like to go to eat?





Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrby's.

 

[Nikki Epperson]

LMAO Lizzy and Sara!

 

[LenaGardner]

Well for the record, maybe I'm not the best mother. Because Nathan's favorite joke is:

Knock Knock.
Who's There?
Bulimic Cow.
Bulimic Cow Who?
Moooooooo which morphs into *blech*puke*vomiting sound*

The delivery in person is better but man......worst part is he was like FIVE when he learned it and it sounded like he was saying "Bully McCow"

 

[Kim]

LOL

I cant remember jokes for the life of me. They are one of those things that go in one ear and I laugh, then they go out the other.

 

[Paula]

Why did the nun get kicked out of the convent?
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for doing push ups in a cucumber patch.

 

[digideb]

:w00t: Paula! lol

 

[Leila]

This is my eldest's favorite joke:

Where did the hamburger take his date?























To the Meat Ball.


Ok, I confess. I like that one too.