rough day...could use some prayers & positive thoughts

J

jessica31876

New member
Today has been a really rough day. My husband has been out of work for nearly six months. I spent the last of our money today paying bills. Well no that isnt true I have 60 cents left in my bank account and 12 cents in my savings account.

My husband filed for disability when it started getting to hard and being to painful for him to continue working. He got a denial letter today in the mail. It said that there is evidence that he cannot do the job he has been doing and is trained for (he is an auto body tech & auto mechanic) but that he is still capable of working somewhere.

We had to apply for foodstamps even though I really do not like the idea of doing so and we were approved BUT they screwed up and sent a card linked to an inactive account and cannot just transfer the card to my account. They have to send a new card which will take 5-7 business days to get here.

Then tonight my husband tells me the battery light in the car came on. He isnt sure if the battery is going bad or not but we do not have the money to replace it if it is.

I keep trying to stay positive and I pray for things to start getting better but it is just getting harder and harder and I just am not sure how much more I can take. I mean I was always careful with money. We paid off our house last year and dont have loans and credit cards. We never lived beyond our means. With two car accidents in 2 years neither of which was my husbands fault it has just devastated our family and finances. Even my 11 year old son was left with two herniated disks from the accident and is left with back pain.

I just really need some good news for once. I simply cannot take anymore bad news. For the last six months its been one bad thing after another and trying to always stay positive when all I want to do right now is just cry is so hard. Please just say a prayer if you can that things will start turning around for my family. I could really use some right now.
 
Jessica, I'm saying prayers for you all.

Please appeal the disability decision--even JP's father was denied the first time around, and he truly could not work at all. He was on dialysis 4+ hours a day 5 days a week and taking so many medications that it made driving dangerous. They insisted he could work though--even though his occupation was school bus driver. :glare:
 
I'm so sorry Jessica, I hope things get better for you and your family.

Hugs! Sending lots of P&PT's.
 
Oh, honey. I'm so so sorry. I cannot imagine the stress you are under. I don't know what else to do but say that I'm praying for you and your family. I have faith that God will provide one way or another. ((hugs))
 
((hugs)) you guys are in my heart.. I've been there believe me. I wish I had some amazing advice to help you through it but I don't.. I had some really amazing friends who were a great help to my heart.
 
Jessica I'm so sorry y'all are going through all of this. Just hold on and hang in there somehow some way. You'll get through it. prayers and many many hugs for you
 
thank you all...my husbands family has really been a great help in the last few months but this economy has hit everyone really hard and so it is tight for everyone we know right now (as it is for alot of people!!). Iit just seemed like it all happened all in one day. I am going to check a few more places that I might be able to get a job...probably just part time but honestly not including food and gas we only have about 400-500 dollars in bills a month so parttime work would even help alot right now.
 
I'm so sorry to hear about this Jessica! Prayers and thoughts are going up for you and your family!
 
((hugs)) :( I'll be hoping for a great job opportunity for him. It's a hard economy right now. I know because my DH has been job hunting since January too. I hope everything works out well for you.
 
So sorry that you are having to deal with all of this. I know that it cannot be easy. I am praying for you and your family that things will turn around soon. (((HUGS)))
 
Jessica I am so sorry to hear of all your bad news. I hope something good comes your way soon. Big hugs to you and we will be keeping you and your family in our thoughts.
 
I'll be thinking of you Jessica!

I'm a Physical Therapist and have had to deal with Disability Insurance quite a bit. You should definitely appeal and then appeal again and then appeal again. Keep appealing. And keep requesting different IMEs (Independent Medical Exams) by whoever they want you to see. Most of these insurance companies actually have quotas for denials they have to meet each month - so just keep after it.

Are you applying for long-term disability benefits through your husband's disability insurance or are you applying for social security disability? If it's social security, that's very hard to get. Unless you're dying, paralyzed or on dialysis - it's extremely difficult - but if they've stated he can't perform his current job duties, he should qualify for some type of vocational rehab assistance (where he is paid to train to learn a new skill that he CAN do).

Just my 2 cents. feel free to tel me to mind my own business!!
 
thanks again for the P&PT.

Jen it is through social security disability. He actually had disability insurance through his job for like two years and did not use it. It did not get bad enough until after his second accident and at that point he was no longer at that job. I wish he had still been at that job because I know it would not have been as hard to get it. What really scares me is that he is going to go into having the back surgery they keep recomending and have it get alot worse instead of better. His surgeon said he honestly has never seen someone with so much damage and he cannot say whether it will improve or decline with surgery.
 
I grew up in this situation. My family was involved in a head on collision with a drunk driver. And my mother was left disabled. She had to fight for years to get disability. She actually had to get a few jobs and get fired because she couldn't do the work. Then she got disability.
My father left her 6 months after the accident. So I spent my childhood (I was 3 when it happened) taking care of my mother.
I am very sorry that you are going through this. I know how hard it is to not know where your next dollar will come from. And having lost my home in February to foreclosure, I can tell you that it is hard all around. I am praying for you and your family. Things will get better. Have faith.
 
{{{hugs}}} Goodness you have been through a lot.

I really don't know anything about filing for disability other than my father had to do it several times and see quite a few doctors (having lots of letters sent on his behalf)... I have seen the paperwork since my dad passed away and it was left in his home. Hard to believe it took him so long to get the disability pay that he needed so desparately.

Is there a Hobby Lobby store in your area? We heard on the news that they raised their minimum wage to $10 an hour...maybe that would help. I know my son makes less than that at the grocery store where he has worked for 4 years. I know that UPS pays pretty good for loading their trucks but whether you can do that I don't know...I know my body couldn't. ds found out about UPS through the college...apparently they have openings quite often. ...maybe they will pay decent through their office too? Check with the local elementary and middle schools...sometimes they pay the people that help with the children of special needs a decent pay.

Here's hoping things turn around for you pretty soon!
 
Jessica, I don't know anything about applying for disability, so I have no advice there, but many ((hugs)) to you. I hope things work out for you, you're so lucky not to have a mortgage and debt, so keep trying to look on the bright side. I'll be thinking about you, and hope things get better for you asap!
 
((hugs)) sweetie! Sending lots of P&PT that things start getting better for you. We certainly know how hard things can get!

Also disability is something you do have to apply to many times in a lot of cases before you actually get approved. My first husband was on disability before he passed away, but we were a rare case to get it first approval thanks to the man who was working with us (my husband was in a pretty bad way at the time too-endless medical problems). So just keep at it.
 
Jessica, (((hugs)))

I don't have any specific advice but I hope things look up for you soon. Be sure to keep us updated! I'm wishing wonderful things your way!
 
thanks again everyone. Ill defenitely update when I know something. We do have an attorney for the accident in November. I try not to think about that because it makes me really angry. The guy who hit us lied bad enough at the scene but when we got the accident report back he didnt tell a single bit of truth. His story makes no sense though so I kinda hope it goes to court and he tries to lie there too.
 
Keep trying for the disability. They turn everyone down several times, especially now, but keep trying!

Is there no money from the accident? If you weren't at fault, then someone else was. Were they both uninsured motorists?

Prayers for you and your family sweetie! I honestly can't imagine, but I know that it could happen to any one of us at any time.
 
4noisyboys said:
Is there no money from the accident? If you weren't at fault, then someone else was. Were they both uninsured motorists?
Click to expand...

To answer that question no there isnt. With three of us being in the accident and my husband having three epidural shots at 5000 dollars a piece we depleted our own insurance coverage.

Here is what happened though....we were sitting at a red light second in line at the light. As far as I know there was nobody behind us. I dont remember seeing anyone directly behind us. The light turned green. The truck in front of us started to move and then kinda shuddered/hesitated. I think it was a standard shift. So my husband had just lifted his foot off the brake and was starting to go and then BAM!!! we get rearended. The guy who hit us gets out of the van he is driving and immediately inspects his vehicle. He sees no external damage so comes over and tells my husband he has no damage so there is no need to call the police. My husband and I are already starting to feel pain though because he did hit us pretty hard. hard enough to bend out hitch all the way into the bumper and my husband said he believes there is frame damage but never hooked it up to a frame machine to measure it. So the guy gets an attitude and reluctantly calls FHP. The officer gets there and goes over to the guy and talks to him for like 20 minutes. Then he comes over to us. My husband is really hurting at this point and tells the officer briefly what happened. The officer asks for our registration and insurance card. My husband could not find our current insurance info but he knows it is there but he found one that was outdated by like three months. The cop says no he cannot accept it and tells my husband he is getting a ticket for failure to show proof of insurance. Then he goes back over to the guy who hit us and talks to him for like another 10-15 minutes and comes back over to us. He tells my husband the guy said he was going like 30-40 miles an hour and we started to back up. This was a 6 lane highway right next to the University of Central Florida!! No way would my husband back up on this road. That is insane. So then the cop goes back to talk to this guy. he changes his story again and says he could have been going no more then like 20 mph. OK so the cop decides that nobody can be at fault for this accident because we had conflicting stories even though the story from the guy who hit us made no sense at all. Soooo then we get the police report and the guys story has once again changed. Now he is saying that we were sitting at a red light and just started to reverse and he was not moving at all. Now the baffling part is if he was sitting directly behind us like he said then how did he get 2400 dollars of damage to his radiator/front grille/bumper/a.c condensor?? No way we could have caused all that damage backing up at a red light with him right behind us right? So basically because of this his insurance company refuses to accept liability. He lied and got out of it for the time being. Our lawyer made a demand on his insurance company and we are hoping they decide it is better to pay it or at least negotiate then to take it to court.
 
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