I VERY lightly spot once a month. Like one pantyliner for one day. Not even. I mean LIGHTLY. Like I wipe and say "oh, my period" and that's the end of it. LOL
I took the pill for four months and was a raving psychopath. I've been off it for about ten days, and I have only cussed in rage at the baby once, and at least then I felt guilty about it, lol.
Have you tried natural family planning? Temperature charting and watching for your fertile signs? Taking Charge of Your Fertility was full of useful information. If my cycles were regular, this is what I'd be doing.