I Need Thoughts - Child Flying Alone

Leah

Leah

New member
Has anyone ever sent their child on an airplane by themselves (unaccompanied minor)? What are your thoughts? Experiences?

My closest friend wants me to send Sydney (9yrs) to visit for a week this summer and then she will fly home with here and stay with us for a couple of weeks. We would have to drive 2 hours to our closest airport and then the flight would be approx. 2 hours.

We have two airlines to choose from - one will assign a flight attendant to her, but the flight attendant still has to preform her regular duties on the actual flight. They would then deliver her to the "guardian" and ask for the proper ID, etc. The cost for this service is an additional $100.

The other airline will not take unaccompanied minors (I think they left one behind once), but they will allow a guardian to fly with her at 50% off the cost of the flight if you return within 24 hours. Sydney would be regular fare. This would cost us approx. $500 when all is said and done (we are only paying one-way for Sydney - so it works out that she would be approx. $200 and either DH or myself, would cost approx. $300 to fly with her and come right back). We are thinking that this is a lot of money.

So we've talked to Sydney and explained that we are probably only looking at her flying by herself on the way there. We've explained to her how it would work and that she can make the decision as to whether or not she is comfortable with it. My friend is coming to visit anyway, so it's not like she wouldn't get to see her otherwise. Sydney asked for some time to think about it, because she said she is scared and just not sure (phew!).

I am seriously hoping (and praying) that she decides that she's not comfortable with it. I really don't know that I could send her alone. I am so afraid of the "what if's" and if something did happen, I just don't want her to be alone.

What are your thoughts? Am I doing the right thing?
 
I used to fly alone all the time. It's honestly pretty safe. No one can abduct her on the airplane so the Flight Attendant doing her regular duties is fine. They sit the kids up at the front and they're on/off first normally. I'd be comfortable sending my 9 year old on a plane alone. I started doing it around 7 or so.
 
Traci Reed said:
I used to fly alone all the time. It's honestly pretty safe. No one can abduct her on the airplane so the Flight Attendant doing her regular duties is fine. They sit the kids up at the front and they're on/off first normally. I'd be comfortable sending my 9 year old on a plane alone. I started doing it around 7 or so.
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The airline told me that they sit the kids just wherever on the plane. She could choose window or aisle and they try to sit them maybe with another child if possible or someone that she would be comfortable with.
Honestly, I'm not concerned with being on-flight, except for "what if" the plane crashes or something. I guess that's really my biggest fear.

Or in the airports...
 
We started sending our boys unaccompanied to visit their grandparents when they were 5 and 7. They're now 10 and 12 and we've never had a problem. Have I been concerned? Of course. But it was always a direct flight and family was at the gate when they got on the plane and met them at the gate when they arrived. Honestly, I'm more nervous this year since my 12-year-old is now old enough to accompany his younger brother. Yikes!
 
if she's scared, don't do it. that's just my opinion.

to ease your worries, however- i fly back and forth between home (massachusetts) and school (buffalo, ny) a couple times a year. and when i came home at thanksgiving, there was a girl (probably 10 or 11) flying by herself- someone was there when she got on the plane, and someone was there when she got off. and i saw her again when i flew back to buffalo after thanksgiving. she sat in the first row of the plane, and the flight attendants would check on her every so often. there's hundreds of people on the plane with her. and i saw quite a few people asking her at the airport how she was and where she was going, and people made sure that she got to where she needed to go. (: (also- i fly jetblue airlines, always)

but- the bottom line is: if your daughter is not comfortable doing it, don't push it. like you said, your best friend is coming out here. so she'll see her. yeah, a week away from home would be fun. but if your daughter is gonna be scared to fly alone? it's not worth it. in my opinion, at least.
 
Heck, we used to ride the bus alone for 6 hrs and about 5 stops from Dallas to San Antonio when I was 10. No way in ((#&$(@#&$(@*#&$ would you see me letting my kids do that now LOL

If you feel she can handle being without a familiar adult, and she can handle herself if your best friend was running late and wasn't right there to meet her, I'd probably let her go.

We'd love to send Connor to see his grandparents, but know that he gets quite panicky if things don't go exactly right, and Aiden just wouldn't do it, even if we begged. But if we could trust that Connor could handle the what-if it didn't go quite right, we'd love to get him out of here for a week every summer. I loved staying at my Grandparents at that age without the rest of the family.
 
Traci Reed said:
I used to fly alone all the time. It's honestly pretty safe. No one can abduct her on the airplane so the Flight Attendant doing her regular duties is fine. They sit the kids up at the front and they're on/off first normally. I'd be comfortable sending my 9 year old on a plane alone. I started doing it around 7 or so.
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Exactly. I did it every summer as a kid.
 
I used to fly unaccompanied all the time, too. I never had any problems and usually had the same experience that Ashley described where some of the more "motherly" passengers took it upon themselves to keep an eye on me. But the flight attendants would check on me, and it always went very smoothly. They always had me sit in the front, as well.
 
We've told her that if she's not comfortable with it - that's OKAY! No way would I send her against her will. No way.

My friends sister used to fly all time too, from Canada to Greece, as a young child. So I know that they have experience with it too.

I never started flying until I was an adult, so my experiences have been limited.
 
Would I let *MY* 9 year old DD fly alone...no way...not ever...but I'm really such a paranoid person. But even in a perfect world I still don't think I would.....I have this insane need to control every.thing.
But there are lots of different maturity levels in 9 year olds and I think some are very mature for their age (mine is not!! :D ) if you feel yours is mature enought to handle *MOST* situations then I say let her. If she is comfortable and you are comfortable then I don't see any problem!!! I think it will be a grand adventure for her!!!
 
mummytothree said:
Would I let *MY* 9 year old DD fly alone...no way...not ever...but I'm really such a paranoid person. But even in a perfect world I still don't think I would.....I have this insane need to control every.thing.
But there are lots of different maturity levels in 9 year olds and I think some are very mature for their age (mine is not!! :D ) if you feel yours is mature enought to handle *MOST* situations then I say let her. If she is comfortable and you are comfortable then I don't see any problem!!! I think it will be a grand adventure for her!!!
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Yah no...I'm like you. lol Paranoid, anal, control-freak. But in talking with DH and my parents (who I trust), they think I'm being over-protective in feeling this way.

Do I think she's mature - absolutely. Could she handle a sticky situation - probably. Do I want her to have - nope.

But maybe it's just me?
 
My DD flew alone last summer from Las Vegas to Houston. She was 14 and I was a little worried, but both airports allowed one adult to go and sit with her until it was time to board the plane. She got on the plane and the flight attendants were very accommodating to her. Both airports also allowed one adult to wait at the gate for her when she returned.

They are actually very protective of the unaccompanied minors on planes and I feel completely safe sending her again. And if she were younger, I would still feel safe about it.
 
Weird that the airlines would just sit unaccompanied kids anywhere on the plane...My cousin flew unaccompanied all the time when she was younger with no problems...I just flew a few months ago and there were 2 kids (not together) who were flying alone and they seated them together...It appeared that they had done it quite a bit and there were no problems...I think if she's ok with it and the flight attendants keep an eye out for them it should be ok...
 
I don't know if I'd do it, but I'm kind of paranoid about things like that. My SIL is planning to send her three girls (11, 6, and 3) to stay with us (from MN to CA) for a few weeks this summer, but my ILs are planning to fly with them - MIL one way, FIL the other.
 
my sisters and i used to fly alone every summer when we were younger - there were never any problems. my oldest is just 4 years old, but when she's older i really hope she'll do it too! she's pretty independent even now (she LOVES to spend the night at her aunt, grandmother and great-aunts' houses - she has been doing that since she was 3 i think) so i think she'll be up for the challenge :) i think it really depends on how your daughter feels (and how you feel too ... ) - i'm a really independent and adventurous person (as is my husband) and i like those aspects of my personality, so i try to instill that in my kids even now ... my DH and i are probably way too loose w/ what we let our kids do alone compared to other people!
 
When I use to fly a lot for my job, I saw many children flying alone... there was always someone from the airline or the airport with them at all time, and I would think that in today's world, that is even more the case.

Since becoming a mama, I've developed a fear of flying!! And this is coming from someone who was traveling for business 70% of the time - flight attendants knew me by name!! :D So given my new found fear... and even when my kiddo is older - I wouldn't send him alone... :)
 
I forgot to mention that they put my daughter in the first row after the first class section.
 
Like a lot of the others, I flew alone as a child every summer - Maine to San Diego. I started at about age 8 as I remember. Never had any problems and always thought it was a great adventure.

This year, for the first time I am sending DD (10) by herself out to San Diego (from Maine) to visit my sister for a few weeks. I am flying out for the last week (couldn't get more time off from work this year). She is very excited to go, but she has flown a lot since being born and is comfortable on planes and in airports. It's not like I'm dropping her off at the terminal and saying see ya either - LOL. I'll be able to go right with her to the gate and meet the flight attendant, so basically she will pass from my hand to the attendant's hand. On the other end I know my sister will be waiting at the gate for her (my sister is obessively early for everything though - as in she'll be there about 5 hours before the flight :blink:) LOL
 
I used to fly by myself as a child every summer and don't remember it being an issue...I remember worrying about someone being at the airport to pick me up when I got off the plane but I wasn't scared. But now, I don't think I would be sending my child on a plane by themselves. I would be too paranoid.
 
I sent Sam to spend the summer with a friend when she was roughly 10. She took her gameboy and had a blast....She even had a layover somewhere coming home to Seattle and was fine. I am just not one of those paranoid parents and I do agree that it dpeends on their maturity level. I also don't believe that the airline can leave her int he airport without the proper person picking her up {i.e. something happened and your friend was late}...but it sounds like she is skeptical so I am not sure I would send her...my DD was all about it and couldn't wait to go.
 
When I was 9 or 10, I flew to/from Hawaii by myself. My adult sister lived in Hawaii. It was a loong flight (6 hours) but I had the time of my life! They put me in first class away from other travelers and I read/played games/talked to the stewardess. If I had to, I'd let my 8 year old fly alone as long as there wasn't any plane changing. Just a direct flight.
 
Since becoming a mama, I've developed a fear of flying!! And this is coming from someone who was traveling for business 70% of the time - flight attendants knew me by name!! So given my new found fear... and even when my kiddo is older - I wouldn't send him alone..
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Now that I read Rebecca's comment, this is totally me, too. My paranoia probably comes from my own dislike of flying!
 
To me it is a bad idea. Anything could happen and I just know that most kids are no equipped to deal with it. I do know people who have flown alone and it worked out ok but I guess Im one of those who looks at the worst case scenarios and just become fixated on those and it terrifies me. I think 9 is a little young for that experience though. Maybe if it was her and a sibling who was around the same age or older it might not be so bad. Heck I am 35 and I wont fly period much less alone.
 
I think it really depends on how she feels. If she is interested in the adventure then fine. If not...I would skip it.
 
I took my first flight alone at 6 and it was no problem. My parents would stay with me until the flight takes off the ground (They are not allowed to leave until the plane is in the air just in case there are any problems :) like the child changing their mind or a technical problem with the plane) and usually you are put in one of the front rows I never travelled as a unaccompanied minor on a flight where I was just sat anywhere. I always remember that I was always boarded first onto the flight and departed last off the flight so that you could be kept an eye on at all times. Also if the person who was collecting you was late they would never just say oh there late sit there and ill go call them they would stay with you until the person arrived (this happened once to me where my guardian was 2 hours late as they had gone to the wrong airport lol)

Personally I don't see a problem with it but I think thats because I have gone through the experience and know what it is like :)

If you don't feel comfortable then maybe its best to wait until shes a bit older? To put your mind at rest x
 
Well she came home from school and said that she wants to go, no question about it. She said that if she doesn't like it, she just won't do it again. lol

Thank you all for your input. Those that have done it and felt good about it helped me to feel better about it too {a little bit better}. :)
 
Not sure if it helps but I was another that traveled as a kid alone, I was 9 at the time and went to my aunts in Detroit. I loved it! I too was put in the front and got special attention. I think when my oldest is 9/10 I would stick him on a plane, heck I would stick my younger on a plane sooner. She is way more mature than him. I would give them a cell to keep in touch with me. And hope all the Takeqondo training kicks in if something should happen. :)
 
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