Hardcore Gratitude Chatter Thread!

Here's my Day 4...a little late :)
I'm grateful for a disease that made me healthier

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I'm going to do a little bit of catch up. I've been stuck on day 2, and just kind of been too busy to really sit down and write it out. Also, this one is hard - not because I can't think of a big mistake, but because I can't really find the thing to be thankful for in any of them! Hopefully something will come to me as I write LOL.

One of the biggest mistakes I've made in my life (though there are several) is that I was not careful with money as a teen/young adult, and I totally messed up my credit beyond repair. My parents never discussed money when I was a kid. I just kind of thought money was just there. Then of course I got older and got a job at 15. I learned a bit about earning/spending. When I went to college, I got multiple credit card apps in the mail and sent them in. So there I was, earning pretty much no money, and having credit cards. I don't know what the heck I was thinking, but I maxed those babies out without thinking twice. Then, to make matters worse, my mom passed away after several years of battling lung cancer. I ended up with a life insurance check. Instead of saving that money towards something good, like a house, I bought a cheap car and then spent the rest - on my credit cards that were now given larger limits because I was spending quite a bit monthy and paying it all off. Long story short, I had no clue what I was doing, and I messed up everything. I ended up with tons of debt, I had quit college, and I had no savings. I still struggle with this today because I think of how much trouble my choices back then have caused me. So, what can I be thankful for in this situation? Well, really the only thing I can think of is that I really learned my lesson in a hard way. I now know how much every financial choice a person makes affects them, even when they are young. I have also learned that it is important to teach kids about money and how money choices affect you for the rest of your lives. So, I am thankful for my mistakes because I know to teach my kids what not to do.
 
Day 3: I was blessed with a pretty awesome family. Of course there has always been trouble - when isn't there? My dad was an alcoholic and ended up taking his own life. He caused so much heartache and hurt for my mom. I was 9 when he died, but I don't even remember much about him because he was never home. I hold a grudge against him for not feeling that my sister and I were more important than whatever he did with his time - so that I could have some memories of him. More recently, I kind of feel abandoned by some of my family. When my mom died when I was 19, I was kind of lost. My dad had already passed. I did have a stepdad, but it just wasn't the same. I have 2 aunts in particular that I thought would really be there for me more than they were. I just feel like - if my sister passed away, I would do everything in my power to make it okay for my nieces and nephew. I would like to think I would check on them, invite them over, go visit them, help them in any way, and just try to have a relationship with them. Not to say that my aunts wouldn't help me out if I asked them, but they didn't call to check on me or anything, maybe once every 6 months or so to invite me to family gatherings (they live 2 hours away). They didn't do anything wrong per se, but I guess I just have a deep disappointment in my heart because I wish it would have been different. I wish they would have felt that my sis and I were important enough to check up on, to reach out to when we were having trouble. Overall, though, I really had to dig deep to come up with someone I was holding a grudge against. I do feel blessed that I have a loving family that is kind and respectful of me. I am thankful for my aunts because, even though they didn't reach out to me then, I know they would help me out if I asked them to. I am thankful for my whole family, good and bad, because every experience I've gone through has just given me more insight into life, and has made me who I am.
 
HI Traci! I mentioned at the women's group I attend your 'hardcore' gratitude challenge on your blog! Several ladies were interested in the prompts . I'll send them to your website!
 
I'm slowly working on mine... and some of them I can't share here yet because they're with new releases coming on Saturday LOL

so all I can share is Day 1
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Day 4: Blessing in Disguise

No matter what happens in life, good or bad, there are reasons. We don't always know the purpose behind them, until way later in life, if ever. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. One of my favorite verses in the Bible says just that, everything has a time and a time for everything under the sun. Sometimes things don't go as we have planned and everything feels like a disaster, like we've failed or it hurts and makes us more sad than we ever thought possible. Later in life, or just down the road a bit, our hearts and eyes are opened completely we can see why our plans didn't work at the time. I wouldn't want to go back and take away any of the senseless things that have happened in my life. It would mean I wouldn't be where I am now, and where I am right now is pretty alright. By no means is it perfect, but it is right exactly where I am supposed to be.

Day 5: The Way you were Raised

Raising children is a tough job, as a mom of 3 I get that, some days way more than others. As strage as it sounds, sometimes its tough to be a kid too. Up until I was 11 or 12, I lived in a pretty 'normal' family, at least as far as a kid could tell. Both of my parents worked (a lot), the were volunteer firefighters, they did their best to provide for us and keep everyone happy. I had (and still have) a younger sister and baby brother. That's when it all changed. My parents went through a messy and ugly divorce. I don't know how much they tried to 'hide' from us or not involve us. But a lot of times, it felt like we were just pieces in their 'game'. I always felt like I had to pick a side and it was never the right one, someone always ended up with hurt feelings. I went through several years where I barely talked to my dad, and to this day we still don't have a solid relationship, and only talk on a rare occasion. It pushed me and my mom apart. We have a pretty good relationship now, but it wasn't always easy. To this day, it feels like 'picking sides' especially during the holidays and times when we should be celebrating. I can't say I'm grateful for their split up, because I'm not. No one wants to be 'that' kid. However, I am grateful for what it taught me about being a parent. Relationships are tough and sometimes things get tougher and when you have children, it's quite possibly the hardest thing ever to keep 'peace' and not let them be in the middle. To make them feel like no matter what happens they have 2 parents who love them, and they don't have to choose a side.
 
Day 6
High school was interesting. I usually hung out with the 'hick' crowd, I fit there best, except I didn't party like they did, and I was quiet and mostly kept to myself. I liked school and did well, for the most part. Most of my friends were guys, and they actually still make up a good majority of them. Since I didn't drink, I didn't go to parties, unless I was the designated driver. It's something I got a lot of flack for, but when I was a kid, going into first grade, my mom was hit by a drunk driver and both the occupants of the other car were killed; and growing up in a 'medical' family, you get to see and hear a lot of stories about that kind of thing. Not something I wanted to be a part of. I wasn't popular and didn't make any real lifelong friends. Of course there are people I am still friends with, but it's not like we see each other often or go out of our way to hang out. I always felt like I was being judged. It's tough to be the 'smart fat girl'. I didn't dress to impress, in fact, quite the opposite. I dressed to blend in, jeans and t-shirts, a pony tail and occasionally a swipe of make-up across my face. Looking at the whole picture, it could have been worse, but it had a lot of potential to be a whole lot more. Either way though, I'm grateful for the experiences I did have and am thankful to have stuck to my beliefs, especially when it came to drinking and driving, I have a few friends who should be thankful for that too.
 
I started this project. I wasn't going to because I am so busy, but I've been reading this thread every day and decided to make the time to do it. :)
 
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For those who don't journal a lot or who want a few pages without journaling, here is mine for Day 6. :)
 
My day 1

Hi gals,

I'm running in a slower pace. Traci wasn't kidding when she said that this would stir up things!
I can't remember if I posted an intro when I registered for the forum, but in case I didn't here is the short version.
My name in real life is Christine, however no one seems to use that anymore. I met my husband online 18 years ago and he has called me by my nickname ever since,Tink. I guess it stuck ;-) On FB I am Tink Bastian as on Twitter and Instagram.

My husband and are expats and that's what my Day 1 is about. We have lived in quite a few countries, this is our second stay in the USA. We normally stay for 3 years but right now we're in our 7th year in the Pacific NorthWest. We have no children except those on 4 paws. 2 Border Collies and 2 evil crazy cats of a special breed with a coat that doesn't shed, Devon Rex, because I am allergic to dust mites and cat dander. Most of my photos are those with furkids in them ;-) We have 1 daughter and she lives with her husband and toddler boy and soon to arrive baby girl in the Netherlands. I miss them terribly, especially during these months.

On to my Day 1, it's all about trying to fit in and being someone you are not. I'm an introvert person, that doesn't mean I am not social I just don't like large groups of people and like my own company. I'm a listener rather than a talker and our society is totally focussed on happy positive extrovert people. What's not to say that introverts are not happy and positive, they just don't show it and process things more inward. There have been many times I have tried to conform at the norm only to become terribly unhappy and uneasy and a betrayal of who I am. I see and know that now, when I was younger I didn't.

I'm in awe at all your creativity and art work!
It has been a long time since I produced a layout, I like how it turned out. It's who I am.

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I loooove that Lex!


Hardcore Gratitude Day 8: Today I'm grateful for what will go down as one of the worst luck vacations ever.


 
I'm a little behind, had to finish up my Christmas presents/cards last week and get those ordered. I played a bit of catch up today, but I have some more to do. Here's what I got done:
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ETA, opps, wonder why i did a different size on the last one. lol
 
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