gah. My son's 21st birthday. How did you celebrate yours?

Julie Billingsley

Julie Billingsley

The Ghost of Awesome Past
My oldest is turning 21 in a few weeks and I need ideas for a family-friendly party. He isn't a partier (at home anyway. Who knows what happens at college. sigh) and his girlfriend is still 20, so they won't be going to a bar or anything. My husband and I don't drink.... we aren't opposed, just haven't done it in forever. We would like to do something special but still family friendly since my 9 year old son will be at the party. I'm struggling for ideas and hoped you all had some thoughts.

When I turned 21, I was almost 9 months pregnant with him, so no party for me. What did you all do on your 21st? Did your parents do anything fun to celebrate?
 
I was a youth sponsor and my 21st birthday was on a Wednesday. So I went to church. LOL I'm not a big drinker anyway- so I waited until my best friend turned 21 a few months later. We went and got something- a daquiri, maybe? and we both hated it. So yeah. I'm pretty exciting.
 
I'm not a partier either and my birthday is on New Year's Eve so I could have partied my butt off if I'd wanted to LOL. I had a bunch of friends over to my parent's house. My mom baked a cake, we drank cappucinos (very cool stuff back in those days) and played games until midnight. Lame for some, but perfect for me.
 
When my DS turned 21 he was in the Marines so I didn't see him ;) On my 21st my DH was in the Marines and we were overseas... not much help am I!? :D

I should also mention that when I turned 21 it wasn't a big deal because I could drink at 18 since the drinking age had not yet changed when I graduated high school.
 
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My youngest just turned 21 in September, and he had forgotten to renew his license until right before his birthday, so he didn't have a current ID or we would've taken him out. He went over to a friend's house and they had a little party there. They did find one little taco place that let him order a beer with his ID...so at least he got to do that.
 
I was pregnant at 21 too. But my sister took me to a bar (neither of us drink and there was no smoking allowed inside). It was karaoke night so it was as crowded as this place ever really got which was about 20 people LOL. And she made a big deal of telling everyone it was my 21st birthday and she knew most of the people so they all told me happy birthday and I got free drinks all night (mostly sprite but also a coke I think). We stayed out until midnight. It was fun and I didnt miss not getting to drink. My daughter just turned 21 also and since she is breastfeeding she can't really drink either. I was sick on her birthday so we took her to Cracker Barrel a couple days later. Before she got pregnant the plan was for me to take her out and we would have a pina coloda...but that was before she got pregnant when we had planned that.

Maybe you could do a small party at home with food from his favorite restaurant?
 
I don't drink, so my opinion may be biased, but I'd say that if you and DH don't drink then don't make a big deal about that part and just celebrate how you always would. In my house that's a special family dinner of the birthday boy's choosing and a cake.
 
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My 21st birthday happened on a Friday night and coincided with the induction of oursorority chapter into the National chapter and I partied all weekend long. The hysterical part is that as a gift, my parents got me and my closest sisters a photography session so we could have our photos taken for the chapter room and a few group shots. Since it was induction weekend, we had to wear white to everything, so with the hang overs we had, dressed in all white, those photos were just awful, we looked like death warmed over and felt like it. Honestly, it wasn't long after that I stopped drinking all together.

With my son this year, I made him his favorite dinner and we had champagne, a glass each, to toast him. Of course we had cake and gifts, but it was just a very small, family dinner on a Tuesday night, his actual birthday. Later that evening, he and his two best friends when on his first beer run, and then they their GFs came back here and had a small party in the family room. No one got wasted and if they drank, they stayed here. It was actually pretty simple. :)
 
We have a local bar and grill that is a great place to be. Like amazing atmosphere and just plain fun. Food is awesome too. SO a group of my friends took me out for my 21st. Not all were 21 so they had virgin drinks or soda, we all ate dinner and they bought me my first drink. It was fun but that is as crazy as it got. At least for that night. LOL

I like the idea of a champagne toast though. That is cool. Just a little something to celebrate him but not going out being all crazy. :)
 
Drinking in the basement with my mom... haha. It was after my grandfather (who was staying with us and had a history of alcoholism) went to bed... but before my dad got home from work (he would not have been happy with my drinking even at age)... so mom and I went downstairs and tried a few drinks of what we had in house... which was like 3 bottles... ;)
 
I spent my 21st on painkillers and an elbow brace. I had injured myself at work the week before. My parents did take me to Laughlin NV to gamble and drink.
 
My boyfriend (now husband) had to work. I had taken off work and my best friend had also taken off. She came over, we played Donkey Kong Country on Super NES. We ordered in pizza and watched It Could Happen to You. Nothing fancy, just a fun night with a friend.
 
You know what? I don't remember. And it wasn't because of alcohol! I'm sure I've got photos of it in my college photo album, though. I have a vague recollection of a few college friends and DH (who was not DH yet :) ) taking me out to dinner or a club, and I think I ordered a drink. One. I've never been much of a drinker--I'd rather use my empty calories for ice cream, thank you very much.

My parents aren't drinkers, and 21 or not they wouldn't have served one of their kids a drink. We probably just went out to dinner someplace nice.
 
I was in Japan,so I was legal to drink for a year when I turned 21. I don't think I really did anything. A nice dinner somewhere he could order a drink if he wanted would be nice. :)
 
i don't think i did much of anything. i've never been a big drinker even back then.

i say do what you always do. if he wants to go out for a drink or buy a beer somewhere that's fine too.
 
Dang! I must be a bad girl. We went barhopping and got drunk, of course!

The kids around here do it up pretty big. Trips to Vegas, limo rides, party buses, etc. My son will be 21 in a few months and since he is the youngest of all his friends I'm sure his friends will take him out. Yeah, that freaks me out.

Sorry Julie, I'm no help!
 
maryinaz said:
Dang! I must be a bad girl. We went barhopping and got drunk, of course!

The kids around here do it up pretty big. Trips to Vegas, limo rides, party buses, etc. My son will be 21 in a few months and since he is the youngest of all his friends I'm sure his friends will take him out. Yeah, that freaks me out.

Sorry Julie, I'm no help!
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You're not alone. My college roommates threw me a party and we were definitely all drunk by the end of it :thumbup: I'm not much of a drinker, but if you don't do it on your 21st birthday, when do you?

My parents took me to Vegas for one of my birthdays, but I think it was when I turned 18.
 
My daughter turned 21 this July. She wanted a party here at home with friends and family. We made all this homemade food, watermelon salsa, appetizers with yogurt dip, etc. She doesn't drink and neither does her boyfriend. We did get a bunch of stuff and she learned to make frozen drinks for the rest of us. They did get all dressed up and go dancing downtown and her friends had a few drinks. She said she had a sip of someone's drink but didn't care for it.

I have some hilarious photos of some of her friends and a dancer pole.
 
I did all my drinking before I turned 21, so by the time I was 21 it wasn't a big deal any more since I wasn't technically being a rebel anymore it wasn't fun anymore...

my boyfriend and I had just broke up because he was going to Africa so I was kinda sad and just went out to dinner with my parents and my dad let me get a drink... I think I just ordered a glass of wine
 
I don't remember it being a big deal, maybe because it was on a Tuesday and in the middle of a work week (back when I had a 9-5 job). I'm not much of a drinker either. If I do remember right, we went to the local Mexican place, and had a margarita and maybe some tequila shots?? (it seems like so long ago...)

I know the year after we went to Vegas (part birthday part honeymoon a month after the wedding, and I was preggo and couldn't indulge in Sin city)
 
I was away at university and went out with my friends.

Take him out for a nice family dinner. Turning 21 is an important birthday. That doesn't mean you have to focus on the drinking age part of it at all.
 
I'm not a drinker and my parents didn't drink either. My 21st...mom took me to New Orleans for the weekend. It would have been nice if she hadn't totalled my car as soon as we got into town, and we had to fly back immediately. I was in too much pain to do much of anything after that.
 
I don't really remember doing much for mine since I wasn't much of a drinker and Adam was still 20. I know for Adam's we went to Chili's because he wanted to show off his ID on his birthday and then they didn't even card him! Thought that was rather ironic considering he was barely 21.

For your son, my suggestion would be to go out to eat at a restaurant that had decent drinks and then leave it up to him if he wants to get something. That way it's not as weird with your younger son or you guys not drinking. I think it'd be kind of weird having drinks at home if he was the only one.
 
My 21st birthday fell on a Monday, so the weekend before I had a whole bunch of college friends for a sleepover and my mom cooked a FEAST. Then we stayed up all night talking and playing card games, etc, and finishing all the food, lol. I think there was beer, but I don't drink so I can't remember.
 
I didn't do anything. Not that I remember anyway. It was just a normal birthday for me.

We're a pretty low key family, so we'd probably just go out to dinner, or have the family come round to our house for a special dinner. Nothing flash - just full of love.
 
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