DS turning 21 ... birthday ideas?

Sharon Kay

Sharon Kay

New member
My oldest ds will be 21 on December 19th. Acckk! When he was in public school he would generally have 3 friends over (# was determined by how many video game remotes they could play on a game)...and they would eat cookie cake and play video games and sleep over all night. During high school we did laser tag 2 years and indoor cart racing another year.

However, he is in college (lives at home) and doesn't see his friends any more... and hasn't really made any friends at college he wants to do anything with... so what do we do?

I suggested to dh we invite family and some of our friends (whom he has grown up around) over for "just cake" and celebrate but dh thinks that ds won't want even to do that. I think we are just going to give him $$ for his birthday because we can't afford the laptop he would like to have for school (it needs to be able to run his complete Photoshop CS4 Suite) ... so hoping family would give him $ too. We hadn't had a family party for him in years ... thought maybe the family would enjoy it...but being it is the 19th of December...I'd need to hurry and get out invites...

...with that being said...I have a few things for Christmas for him (nothing big) and guess we will give him more $$ towards the computer... but he's going to have to save some $$ up too...

I'd like to make the birthday special...but just not sure HOW...
 
ummm not really sure...my daughter just turned 18 and we couldnt do much so we had friends and family come to the park and had cake and stuff. It was nice. She had a good time as well. Maybe he could invite some of his friends from high school that hed like to spemd some time with?
 
Is there somewhere special he likes to go to? You said video games... maybe an arcade or laser tag with some buddies? If it was my step dad's family... they would be hitting the casino since they are old enough to drink... LOL!
 
We always have a 'family party" ... dinner, cake, presents for any of the kids if they have a 'friend' party or not. If he feels uncomfortable with the 'party part, maybe just dinner and cake(LOL, and of course presents!), but no singing?

Did that movie 'Avatar' look interesting to him? It opens on the 18th. Maybe a family get together and then all go see a movie? Or go see a movie and then come back to your house for cake?(...and presents!).

My bonus sons are now 19 and 20(I have known them since 4 and 5). We take them out to dinner and then if they are in town, we come back and have cake at home.
 
My mom always just took us out for dinner at a restaurant of our choice at that age. Though a small family party at home could be fun, too. I wouldn't try to do anything friend-ish for him at this age even if there were a bunch of friends he had.
 
lovely1m said:
I wouldn't try to do anything friend-ish for him at this age even if there were a bunch of friends he had.
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x2. I stopped expecting anything for my birthday after I graduated high school. I mean yes, I still get presents, but there's no party, there's no get together. I was away at college and then moved away from home. Even if I was at home, at that age I wouldn't want to have a "party" with my family and friends, hosted by my parents.
 
He's not a "movie person" (his words lol)...he just doesn't go places like arcades (he usually thinks they are "lame" compared to what he plays online)...he has his online friends but of course they aren't local...

We had thought about taking him to the "Road House" restaurant for steak (that he does like)...but we took him to another one just like it when we visited Ft Smith a month ago so it's not too much of a surprise for a new place... I guess I could make one of his favorite meals and give him more $$ than if we went out for steak...or maybe dh could cook out on the grill.

I just wanted it to be a special "memory" of his 21st...he's not a drinker and doesn't seem to be interested and I'm fine with that... he's a really good kid... always calls if he is going to be late coming home from work or school. It would be fun to take him to a casino, but that could be a lot of $$ blown on playing games or slots ... that he could put towards his computer. Sounds like I am talking myself out of taking him any place... but how to make it a special memory? ...am I putting too much stock in a "year"??
 
Sharon Kay said:
but how to make it a special memory? ...am I putting too much stock in a "year"??
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OK, I'm the party pooper I guess...when you get past being a kid, I'm sorry, but birthdays are just another day IMO. I think alot of times parties are more for the planners than the birthday person. I resented my parents for throwing some parties for me...I was not a social party person, and I did not like being pushed into the limelight.
From high school years on, my mom (dad rarely) took me out to the restaurant of my choice, or we took an overnight trip. For my 21, my BF and I flew to Vegas for a weekend. Both of our parents were going through divorce and home was super-stressful, so our parents sent us on one of those cheap package deals. We had a great time.
OK, last thought...what does he want to do? That was the general thing when I got older...do you want to go somewhere special for your bday? Or would you like the $ instead? It's his day...let him decide (just MO)
 
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