I have no idea how though this must be for you. Not knowing what's going to happen is hard. But what a beautiful and honest journal! I love the way you wrote down your feelings, I love how you scrapped them. I love all the details in the elements and the beautiful clusters. What a perfect layout!
I truly hope you'll get through the challenges you are facing. Love the honest and heartfelt journaling, the fantastic element work, and creative title work.