Anyone else a worrier?

MissKim

MissKim

Active member
My 17 year old daughter had a forensics tournament today. It's in a town about an hour from us. My husband dropped her off at 6 am. The coach had apparently cancelled the bus for the day, so the assistant coach had to call someone with the district and get a 12 passenger van that he can drive to take the team.

They left here at 7:30 am finally. First round was supposed to be 8-9:30. I know the roads between here and there are very bad. It's been mentioned on the news that the salt shipment our town ordered to treat the snowpacked and icy roads here cannot get here because it's coming from her destination and the roads are awful. So I asked her to text me when she arrived because... bad roads, they're already late, etc.

It's now 9:40 am and she hasn't texted. My husband and my other teens are telling me that she had to go right into performing, that I'm overreacting, that I'm silly and stupid.

I cannot stop thinking that it would have taken 30 seconds for her to text me "we're here" as they pulled into the parking lot. I've texted several times. I've taken to calling every five minutes. Nothing.

I wish I'd installed a GPS tracker in her phone. I'm about to the point where I'm just going to get in the car and drive that way. I know I'm a worrier but seriously it is so easy to stop my worrying with a two second text. I don't have any phone numbers of the coach or anything or I'd call him.
 
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Oh Kim, I'd be behaving the SAME way (esp knowing how the roads are here... where was she going?) And I also know my husband and friends would tell me to chill out.

I'm SURE she's fine, but I know that doesn't ease a mama's worry. Keep us posted when you hear from her. *HUGS*
 
My daughter just finally texted. They are there safely. She forgot to text.

However... I do this all the time. When someone doesn't do something they said they'd do, I automatically assume the worst. Probably because in several cases, the worst happened... a student passed away, my dad had a car wreck, etc.
 
Libby Pritchett said:
Oh Kim, I'd be behaving the SAME way (esp knowing how the roads are here... where was she going?) And I also know my husband and friends would tell me to chill out.
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Libby, she's in Hutchinson.

My family keeps telling me I'll be a mess next year when she's in college and not living at home. Somehow I think that might be easier.
 
I've been like this since I was a little kid and my parents would go out on a date.. I'd be home up at night worrying. It hasn't gotten any better since ;)

My husband has a habit of forgetting to call or let me know things.. It drives me crazy. :)

So glad she got there safely! <3
 
Yep, I ALWAYS assume the worst in situations like that. Always. If my husband is late coming home, I am planning my life as a widow.

I hate being that way.

I've really been working on turning it over to God and praying when I get in a stressful situation like that. It helps, but my first instinct is always to jump to the worst possible outcome.
 
Me! I have to really work to control catastrophic thinking and worrying in general. I'm pretty laid back overall but I think too much, I'm my own worst enemy sometime.
 
Libby Pritchett said:
Yep, I ALWAYS assume the worst in situations like that. Always. If my husband is late coming home, I am planning my life as a widow.

I hate being that way.

I've really been working on turning it over to God and praying when I get in a stressful situation like that. It helps, but my first instinct is always to jump to the worst possible outcome.
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this is totally me too :wub:
Glad she's safe!!
 
Kim, does she have an iPhone? You can always do the "find my iPhone" app on her phone and then all you have to do is log in on the comp and it'll tell you where her phone is.
 
No iPhone. I don't let my kids have one until they can pay for it themselves and I won't let her get a regular job because she's got a 4.0 and enough school activities that I'm afraid the job would affect her grades. However, I did just figure out what will help me when she's in college....
 
Raises hand - I am a worrier too. Especially since my dd started to drive and her schedule takes her all over Southern California. Our freeways are horrible and her morning drive to school is about 45 minutes away and in heavy traffic. I use the "find my iphone" feature on her phone to find her since I can't call her while she is driving. She is used to it and tries to text me when she arrives at her destination. If she doesn't she will see a ???????? on her phone from me and that is our message that translates to "Um where are you????"

Kim, I am in the same boat about college - I seriously am nervous about her going off and praying that some of the local private colleges she has applied to will provide her enough scholarship money that she will stay home with us.......keeping fingers crossed. :)
 
MissKim said:
My family keeps telling me I'll be a mess next year when she's in college and not living at home. Somehow I think that might be easier.
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Actually Kim, it IS easier when they are away at college. I'm a HUGE worrier! I can make myself sick with it. My 2 oldest live away at college and I do try to text them every other day or so, but at least I don't have to worry about what time they are coming home, or if they got somewhere safely because I just don't know about it! Honestly, it really is a matter of "out of sight, out of mind" and just realizing that there is nothing you can do anymore to protect them. It's time for them to function on their own.

No iPhone app for us. That would make me worry even more. When they are not living with us, they have their privacy and independence and they don't need me tracking their movements. I always ask myself, what would I do if I saw they went somewhere I don't approve? Call them up and yell at them? Run after them? Punish them? It's a whole different ballgame when they are officially adults. No matter how much they are on my dime.

So glad she texted you! :)
 
maryinaz said:
Actually Kim, it IS easier when they are away at college. I'm a HUGE worrier! I can make myself sick with it. My 2 oldest live away at college and I do try to text them every other day or so, but at least I don't have to worry about what time they are coming home, or if they got somewhere safely because I just don't know about it! Honestly, it really is a matter of "out of sight, out of mind" and just realizing that there is nothing you can do anymore to protect them. It's time for them to function on their own.
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Aw, thanks for telling me that. She's only going 20 minutes away (and like 2 minutes from my work) so it's not too far, but I really don't want to know if she's going out late at night with friends or anything else. I'll have to accept that I've done my best and trust her to make the right decisions. My son's in college but he lives at home. And does nothing but work and go to college, so no need to worry.

My daughter is the worst about texting when she gets somewhere. She thinks it's silly. I've had to let her know that if she continues to not text, it will have an effect on her privelege of driving. She rarely forgets now.
 
I'm consistently a worrier - like is the bus going to turn up, will I be late etc so much so I have had stress breakdowns when life gets too full on
 
So I thought of this thread last night when my dd called upset because some guy was following her and cutting her off on her way home late last night. My dh and I met her on the way but I tracked her car to make sure she was ok until I could hold and hug her. Police were called and they will look up the license plate to cite the guy for reckless driving but it was a scary situation that made me grateful for technology today.
 
I just had to bump this up because she did it again. We allowed her to drive to a different town (about 20 minutes away) to see a movie with a friend. I just asked her to text when she arrived. Movie started 40 minutes ago and no text. I actually did a check in text 10 minutes before the movie started, when she should have been sitting in the theater, because I figured she forgot. She has not responded. I called multiple times. No response.

She will now be paying a monthly fee so I can install software on her phone so I can always see exactly where she is. I'm almost angry enough that she'll now be paying for her own gas as well. She's a responsible girl and a valedictorian, but if I allow you to drive on your own, you can have enough courtesy to let me know you arrived safely. It's not about being overprotective, it's about respecting your parents.

Funny thing is, I know the girl she was meeting has to text her mom every time she drives anywhere, so I know she did it.
 
Or the friend forgot to text her mom, too...

Been there, done that, worried too. My oldest has been away at college for 5 years now and the youngest (20)will move out over the summer. It really is easier when they are away because you don't know when they are driving late. I just figure I'm the one that taught them to drive and to be the responsible people they are. I'm proud when my daughter tells me she's the designated driver for her friends and will even pick up a friend who's been drinking and take them home. Youngest still forgets to text me about 40% of the time when I ask him to.
 
Sorry to hear that Kim! It's the HARDEST thing being a parent of a teenager! Ugh.

My DS2 (19) just informed me that he is picking up his roommate, in his roommate's car, from the Phoenix airport. Kill me now. *I* can barely maneuver that airport! I wish he hadn't even told me. Out of sight, out of mind is so much better! (and now I'm praying hard!) :crying:

Hope you hear from her before the movie is over!
 
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