Life is always going to be confusing isn't it :p

lauren grier

lauren grier

you're like stars
We were all so lied to. I thought being a teenager was a mess. That getting older things would be so much clearer. Hah. I'm 31 and days like these lately make me feel like I'm still my idiot 15 year old self who didn't know up from down. I'm not any wiser I just have bigger problems. I even had to go to my parents the other day and just have word diarrhea at them for hours because I felt so overwhelmed and just wanted someone to tell me what to do ---they didn't. Lol. But I at least am old enough now to know to talk to each one separately. I'm a perfect mix of my parents so getting each reaction was like talking to the two sides of my own brain. The firey passionate rage that is my mother and the calm quiet fixer in my father. I'm so grateful for my parents. We have had a long rough history (well. The firey rage side ) and its really wonderful being able to go to them now in crisis. Maybe that's what the real 'wisdom' in age is. It's not that I know wth I a doing but that my parents are now the people that I turn to.
Still. My 15 year old self would rather sleep all day and not deal with the universe. :p
 
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and was so easier to
"I wanna that thing"
"ok, but you cant win that now"
"WHY?"
"I dont have money"
"give a check!"
"no, I wont do that"
"you are so mean!"

:P I was SO stupid. sorry, Mom and Dad. lol
 
My 36yr old self is a way hotter mess than my 15yr old self...if we only knew then what we know now though
 
My 15 year old self would not be impressed with my waistline but she'd love the fact that I can work in jammies.
 
wish I was "fat" today as I "was" when I was 15 years old. lol (I think that is wrong, but I dont know the right way to say lol)
 
No way would I ever go back to being 15! It's like that little meme going around that says "I feel like I'm 18 until I hang around a bunch of 18 year olds, and then I'm glad I'm not 18 anymore.

I agree that things get harder. I was talking to someone about how 2 kids feels so hard, but somehow people manage more. They must have better kids or be better moms or something. My friend told me that the chaos never goes down, but your ability to handle it will be ever increasing. So that's how I like to think about it. I'm grateful to be learning and growing and aging, because going through all of the hard times somehow makes me like myself better. So, hang in there. This too shall pass.
 
Rubia Padilha said:
wish I was "fat" today as I "was" when I was 15 years old. lol (I think that is wrong, but I dont know the right way to say lol)
Click to expand...

I totally understand what you're saying! I thought I was fat in my early 20s in a size 5... Then I got pregnant with twins, and well, my body has never been the same :( I totally wish I'd really seen myself and enjoyed it while I had it and not tried to hide it all the time!!

I, too still feel like a confused kid most of the time - but being around 'kids' these days, that's when I feel old!
 
No one ever told me it would get easier - quite the opposite really. I saw the struggles of my family at a young age. You couldn't pay me a $1 million to be 15 again. I'll take my thicker waistline, saggier bewbs, hot flashes, and old people problems any day of the week over being a teenager these days.

Some days I feel like a complete mess, but then I look around and I live in my own house living my own life with a man who loves me even when I'm a mess. I have a lot to be thankful for and that wasn't always obvious as a teen. I'm glad to see more of the good with the bad at 40 than just the crazy drama and rosey idealism of a teen.
 
I'd much rather be an adult. High school cliques, all the friend drama, fights with parents, needing permission for everything...no thanks. But I definitely miss my younger body (which I hated at the time), having friends like my high school friends, and having my free time be my own.
 
Is this about the boy, La? Now I'm feeling worried about you.

I actually like being a grown up. I feel very grounded & optimistic about life.

Of course, being highly emotional, that could all change at a moment's notice.

And, yes, parents become amazing once you leave their home. Except for me as a parent. My kids are TOTALLY gonna appreciate me always.
 
I appreciate how hard my mom worked growing up (she was a single parent from the time I was 10).....I saw alot of things growing up that I swore I was going to get away from and no matter what I did in life there was No WAY IN HELL I was ever going to give up on anything!!!!
I don;t want to be 8 or 15 LOL! So I spent 20 years in the Navy (got everything I wanted from it), think I am raising 4 fairly good kids, have a great job at the VA and NOW I am going to pursue my dream of having my own photogrpahy business...hang in there La, you are absolutely one of the strongest women I know :) :wub:
 
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