Do you always say goodnight to your SO?

Valgal

Valgal

New member
Just wondering. I don't always, but then when HE goes to bed w/o saying goodnight I feel all weird and rejected.

NEEEEEDY, right?
 
Nope...not needy. We always say "goodnight" & "love you" before going to bed. It's usually me going to bed first & i'll say it. If he goes to bed first & doesn't say it, it's weird. Or he can tell if I'm mad about something because I won't say it.
 
We say it every night. It's almost always DH going to bed first, but even if he's half asleep he'll mumble a "good night" as he heads upstairs. I don't know why, but I'm big on saying goodnight and saying goodbye when people leave the house (which DH doesn't always do--and yes, I feel weird about it).
 
Sometimes I fall asleep while reading, but with the light on and everything. But he went to bed, lights out and door closed and everything and didn't say goodnight :(

Why do I feel like he's mad?
 
We always say goodnight, and we always kiss. It just feels wrong not to. Aaron has this thing about us going to bed at the same time, too. I used to feel so annoyed when he would insist, but now it's a habit. Unless one of us has to work late on the computer or we are sick... we head to bed at the same time.
 
Aw, Val... I would wonder if he was mad, too. Sometimes men do things like that without even thinking about feelings, though. Maybe he didn't want to wake you?

I know I would obsess. In fact, I have done annoying things like wake up Aaron to make him say goodnight when he forgets. Aren't I nice? LOL
 
I usually say goodnight to my honey buns and smack his butt if hes standing up. Lol. We go to bed at the same time during the week but he usually stays up later during weekends playing video games. If i dont say goodnight, im annoyed about something and if he doesnt say good night its because hes too tired to function.
 
We almost always go to bed at the same time, but if he's staying up late to watch sports, we'll say goodnight beforehand. In bed just before we go to sleep he'll give me a kiss and say Sweet Dreams. Every time. Ahh...so sweet. :)
 
Occasionally... my husband is often still at work when I go to bed. If he is home, he's often fallen asleep on the lounge in front of the TV. On the occasion when we're both still awake when I go to bed (I'm the first in bed 99% of the time since I'm an early riser), I'll say goodnight.
 
We say goodnight almost every night, unless I fall asleep when he gets to bed. I get on the bed first because we co-sleep our son :)
 
Yes... unless I'm sick and I have fallen asleep before he comes to bed. We also go to bed at the same time - however, he usually always goes to sleep before me, and I will be sitting up reading, watching tv, or working on the computer.

He also will say goodbye in the morning when leaves for work and gives me a kiss - when he doesn't, then I feel like he is mad at me... haha... but when he is stressed and thinking about work, is when he forgets. :)
 
I don't even know how to answer this question. Unless we've decided to watch a movie together (which we do about once a week lately), we barely talk to each other at all once the kids are in bed. We are both introverts and use that time to do our own thing and regroup. He'll often fall asleep in the bedroom while he's watching something on TV, and I'll often fall asleep reading. We do say goodnight sometimes, but it's definitely not a thing that we feel like we need to do. We do make sure to say goodbye before either one of us leaves the house, but we just don't have a very cuddly relationship. It's not who we are. I sure do love him though.
 
I go to bed before Dave every night, but he comes up to bed and cuddles and tucks me in before he heads back downstairs to play video game or whatever :)


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msbamf2you said:
I usually say goodnight to my honey buns and smack his butt if hes standing up. Lol.
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:D:D:D

Lyd said:
I don't even know how to answer this question. Unless we've decided to watch a movie together (which we do about once a week lately), we barely talk to each other at all once the kids are in bed. We are both introverts and use that time to do our own thing and regroup. He'll often fall asleep in the bedroom while he's watching something on TV, and I'll often fall asleep reading. We do say goodnight sometimes, but it's definitely not a thing that we feel like we need to do. We do make sure to say goodbye before either one of us leaves the house, but we just don't have a very cuddly relationship. It's not who we are. I sure do love him though.
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I am quite certain that this is how my ds will be if he ever marries. There is another introvert in his group of friends, a girl, and the joke that goes around is that if the two of them ever got married they'd never be in the same room as each other, lol!
 
Valgal said:
I am quite certain that this is how my ds will be if he ever marries. There is another introvert in his group of friends, a girl, and the joke that goes around is that if the two of them ever got married they'd never be in the same room as each other, lol!
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Lol. Yeah. My high school friends used to tease me because I don't like people to be touching me if we're sitting next to each other or whatever. They were always laughing about what it would be like when I got married.
 
Lyd said:
I don't even know how to answer this question. Unless we've decided to watch a movie together (which we do about once a week lately), we barely talk to each other at all once the kids are in bed. We are both introverts and use that time to do our own thing and regroup. He'll often fall asleep in the bedroom while he's watching something on TV, and I'll often fall asleep reading. We do say goodnight sometimes, but it's definitely not a thing that we feel like we need to do. We do make sure to say goodbye before either one of us leaves the house, but we just don't have a very cuddly relationship. It's not who we are. I sure do love him though.
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Gosh, this is completely the same as how things are at my house!! We usually DO end up saying goodnight to each other, but it's not something I feel incomplete without.


I will say though, that I tend to overthink things (like you guys are saying about him going to bed without saying goodnight and thinking he's mad at you about something) and have discovered for my husband at least, it's almost NEVER about me or him being mad at me. He just doesn't think about it because his brain isn't wired that way (so for example, if I went to bed without saying anything to him, he'd never think "is she mad at me?!?!" - he probably wouldn't give it a second thought). This was something hard learned in our marriage, I took a lot of things (and still do, sometimes) way too personally when really he just...didn't think of it.
 
misfitinmn said:
Gosh, this is completely the same as how things are at my house!! We usually DO end up saying goodnight to each other, but it's not something I feel incomplete without.


I will say though, that I tend to overthink things (like you guys are saying about him going to bed without saying goodnight and thinking he's mad at you about something) and have discovered for my husband at least, it's almost NEVER about me or him being mad at me. He just doesn't think about it because his brain isn't wired that way (so for example, if I went to bed without saying anything to him, he'd never think "is she mad at me?!?!" - he probably wouldn't give it a second thought). This was something hard learned in our marriage, I took a lot of things (and still do, sometimes) way too personally when really he just...didn't think of it.
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There have been times where I'll walk around paranoid for a week before I finally break down and say something like, "What did I do? Why are you acting so weird? Can we talk about this????" And he'll be like, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

:blink:

Women WAY over-think things sometimes for sure.
 
We 95% of the time go to bed at the same time and we say goodnight in the bed and try to say i love you too....if by chance one of us goes to bed before the other then we always say goodnight.
 
Absolutely. We ALWAYS say it and it drives me crazy if one of my kids goes to bed without saying goodnight and giving me a hug and kiss. I feel violated. I know it sounds odd, but I need that. I gave my grandma a hug and kiss and said goodnight to her every night when I was living at home. If she fell asleep before I went to bed, I'd wake her and give her a hug and kiss. She slept on the couch in the living room and was always a super light sleeper anyway so she liked to know where we all were. Sean and I have always said goodnight, sweet dreams, God bless, and love you before bed. We sleep on different shifts. He works while I'm sleeping, I work while he's sleeping. I tell him good night in the morning as he is coming home from work and I am going to work. He tells me good night before he goes to work at night. If he is going in early or working some strange shift, I'll text him to say good night before I go to sleep. I also get a 'good morning sexy' text EVERY.SINGLE.MORNING during the school year when I am working. In the summer I'm usually still sleeping when he gets home so he tells me in person. :)
 
One of my boys will come in and say good night no matter how late he is up, as long as he can still see that my Kindle is still lit up. I always have to grab the covers and pull them up over my chest because I'm paranoid about my boobs around teenage boys, lol! He's my huggie lovie kid.
 
Yep. I'm a total introvert and we are definitely in the don't need to speak category but we always say something nice to each other before bed."I have great affection for you", "you annoy me less than any other person" ;). I always tell my girls I love them too, even after yelling or being pissed I remind them that even if I'm soo mad, I love them.
 
Keely~B said:
Yep. I'm a total introvert and we are definitely in the don't need to speak category but we always say something nice to each other before bed."I have great affection for you", "you annoy me less than any other person" ;). I always tell my girls I love them too, even after yelling or being pissed I remind them that even if I'm soo mad, I love them.
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That's a fave here. "I don't like you very much right now, but I love you."
 
I always do. He's gone so much with the military and could be deployed at a moments notice, so I always say it. I don't know if I won't be able to say it in the near future or not.
 
I almost always go to bed before John and always stop tell him good night and I love you and kiss the top of his head.
 
Jenn Barrette said:
I go to bed before Dave every night, but he comes up to bed and cuddles and tucks me in before he heads back downstairs to play video game or whatever :)


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Well that is just about the most adorable thing I've ever heard. :wub:
 
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