I hate this time of year.

[LJSDesigns]

I am not a winter person, so I struggle through February and March because of how cold and gloomy it is. I find that I am much more emotional during these months and tend to malinger too. Don't feel great, but not really sick, ya know?

I know it is seasonal depression and I do make sure to take my meds, but this time of year is always hardest. I was just wondering if anyone else found February and March hard to stand too. If so, what do you do, if anything, to try to lift your spirits?

[Memaw2Wm]

The older I get, the more I dislike the cold weather. I've been whining about the cold since late October and likely will continue to whine until mid-April.

I think February and March are the worst b/c February seems to be the coldest month, and by March I am simply done.

Hang in there!

[laurabobaura]

I can relate. my dad passed last February so this February was a bit of a reminder of that.

(hugs)

[3BluEyedBabi]

Decorating for Spring/Easter and getting started on Spring gardening always helps me. A trip to the greenhouse helps the most!

[karlimarie]

This is part of the reason that we landed in North Carolina. I just don’t do well in the cold weather. I don’t want to be cold. I don’t want to have to wear everything I own just walking around my house. I need sunshine and fresh air. I need to be able to sit on the porch in the morning with my coffee. I am just a better functioning human person when I am in contact with nature and I can’t do that enough in the winter.

Have you looked into light therapy? A friend of mine bought one of those light lamps and it helped her get through the gloomiest parts of winter.

Also, you mentioned taking meds- maybe speak to your psychiatrist about boosting your dose or adding a new med seasonally? Just a thought!

The other thing I’ve done is try to make my home as cozy as possible and equip myself with clothes that allow me to feel as warm as possible. So for example, I have blankets EVERYWHERE in the winter. I have several in the living room, one on my porch, in the bedroooms, one for my computer chair. If I’m sitting, there’s a blanket on my lap. And not just any blanket- in my living room I have a full on down comforter. I also have a heated wearable blanket when things get dire It might be gloomy out, but I WILL be cozy inside.

I also have about a million fuzzy socks, they’re all over my house so my feet are never cold. I have a nice pair of slippers, a warm cardigan with a hood that I practically live in all winter long. And then when I have to go out and I know I’ll be in the cold for a period of time I either layer up- leggings under pants, or I wear this amazing pair of fleece lined leggings. They are sooo comfy! I always layer shirts, sweaters, jackets- I’d rather take something off than be too cold. It’s taken a few years for me to find the best cozy items to make myself feel warm and good, but it was totally worth it.

Hope some of this is helpful. Winter can be so challenging, even when you leave in a warmer climate it’s still a dreary time of year!

Oh! One more thing. I am that person who pulls away from friends and family when I’m not in a good headspace- basically when I need people most I stop reaching out for help. I don’t know why I do it, best left for therapy- BUT one of the ways I’ve hacked this is by telling my friends and family… when you don’t hear from me I need you to reach out. I’m not going to want to, but I need you to drag me out of the house because I actually need connection even though I am acting like I need isolation. So maybe give a heads up to people that are close to you that you need a little more connection to feel better and grounded?

[allyanne]

This will sound counter-intuitive, but it worked for me. I try to be outside as much as possible, no matter the weather. I've invested in clothing and gear that helps me be comfortable, and I love walking. I did a 1000 Hours Outdoor challenge last year, and I can't even begin to tell you the impact it had on my mental and physical health. It can be a difficult transition to make, but now I feel weird if I've been inside too long and I know that a walk outside will sort me out in no time. When this isn't possible, I use a Happy Light in the morning to make sure my brain is getting a hit of the correct color and wavelength of light.

Also, do whatever makes you happy. Little treats, special comforts, stuff you know will bring delight and joy. I hear you on February & March being rough, but since I've been spending more time outside (and also starting a bazillion seeds inside under grow lights) I have found them to be much more bearable!
I hope you find something that helps you. Hugs!!

[AmieN1]

Totally agree- usually february/march is ugly here- the snow has melted but nothing is green yet so it's just shades of brown. Blech. This weekend the sun is out & it's actually glorious! I try to get outside for even just a small walk to the mailbox cause fresh air (even if it's cloudy or ugly) still does my mental health some good!

[aussiegirl]

I actually enjoy the winter months more than the summer months (mostly because I don't like heat and humidity). But I like winter when there is pretty white fluffy snow to look at from inside my home with nowhere else to go! And I like summer because it means usually traveling or doing something fun when all my "babies" are home!

Seasonal blahs can be tough though. Maybe buy yourself a pretty new outfit (maybe a spring one to make you happy!), maybe add some new decor or freshen up what you have (I want to decorate for Easter soon, but need to get past ST Patrick's day first). Buy a new candle in a scent you really like. Read a good book so you lose yourself in a different place (one that takes place in a different country you have always wanted to visit or in a different time period).

[HavaDrPepper]

I have no problem with seasonal depression in February/March even though I hate winter. It shows up for me between Thanksgiving and New Year's. I had 3 grandparents and my mother pass away during those 6 weeks over the years. And, with not having either parent, no siblings or no children Christmas season is not fun at all.

I'm not on meds but I find that if I do something that keeps my mind busy during that time, it helps keep the depression from getting worse. Since 2016, that has been doing jigsaw puzzles. I also tend to scrap a lot during that time.

Once the calendar changes to January 1, the fog lifts for me.

As for the weather, we had flurries a couple hours ago but it could be in the 60's next week, maybe even hit 70 a week from now!

[LJSDesigns]

Thanks for all the advice. I think being outside does help, but I definitely have to invest in warmer clothes. I am always cold, so I can't hack being outdoors for long.

I suffer from anxiety more than depression, but this is the time of year when I feel my lowest. I do try to stay busy, but my emotions are right off the surface and everything feels like a bigger deal then it actually is.

[nietis]

Big big hugs to you, Lorie.
This time of the year is always busy in our household because it's the start of school's 2nd semester after a long Chinese New Year holiday at the end of January/start of February... so time tends to go in a blink for me. But I usually hate the cold because the building's central heating turns off on March 15th and that will make it colder inside home than outside. And since I am almost always alone at home during the time everybody is in schools, I feel all the cold.
This year, winter had been soooo much milder than usual, so I hope that it won't be too cold next week...

[craftytam]

I'm sorry you have to deal with SAD. Our middle son deals with it. We never knew about it until moving up to Idaho almost 8 years ago now. The winters are brutal for him. He is starting Lineman school in July, and once he graduates, he'll probably move southward.

[karlimarie]

Hey Lorie! Just wanted to check in and see how you were doing.

[LJSDesigns]

Thanks for asking, Karlimarie. Last week was hard. I cried a lot and it was mostly over silly things like a sad song. But then, I spent time with my grandson on Saturday -- we played outside a lot and I left feeling so much better. He just brings me so much joy.

So far this week has been better, so I am hopeful that I will be out of this funk soon.

[jaye]

Lorie, I hope this week continues to be better for you.

I am not a February-March or November-December person either. I love snow, but don't like being cold. Here November is dreary and grey, March can be winter, fall, and teases us with spring. Both months see rain, sun, snow, and windy.

[laurabobaura]

glad you were able to spend some family time, Lorie

[karlimarie]

Originally Posted by LJSDesigns

Thanks for asking, Karlimarie. Last week was hard. I cried a lot and it was mostly over silly things like a sad song. But then, I spent time with my grandson on Saturday -- we played outside a lot and I left feeling so much better. He just brings me so much joy.

So far this week has been better, so I am hopeful that I will be out of this funk soon.

Sorry you had a hard week, but sounds like it had a happy end. So often what we need is genuine connection to break out of a funk- and children, while the cause of so much stress, can also be the cure!

I find myself getting more emotional as I get older. Almost like I turned off that faucet in my 20s but now it’s just in free flow. I think it probably has to do with me starting perimenopause. My hormones are just a whacked as when I was in puberty I guess it’s just the price we women pay for daring to make it to middle age

[LJSDesigns]

Originally Posted by karlimarie

I find myself getting more emotional as I get older. Almost like I turned off that faucet in my 20s but now it’s just in free flow. I think it probably has to do with me starting perimenopause. My hormones are just a whacked as when I was in puberty I guess it’s just the price we women pay for daring to make it to middle age

The closer I get to 60, the more I find myself thinking about well, death, but not in a scary way. I am not afraid of death, I just want to make sure I leave my little part of the world in good shape for my family. I did my estate planning a few years ago, and feel really good about that and now I am concentrating on decreasing my debt before I retire. Otherwise it is cat food for me. LOL

[jaye]

Originally Posted by LJSDesigns

The closer I get to 60, the more I find myself thinking about well, death, but not in a scary way. I am not afraid of death, I just want to make sure I leave my little part of the world in good shape for my family. I did my estate planning a few years ago, and feel really good about that and now I am concentrating on decreasing my debt before I retire. Otherwise it is cat food for me. LOL

I hear you. I will be 58 this year and am able to retire from my job with the school board on a full pension. I want to retire from this career, I have done it long enough and I am burned out, it is time to step away.

I will still have to work even with my pension and I am perfectly ok with that as I don't want to just sit at home (not healthy for my mind). I have my little part time job at the camera store that I love and am hoping to be able to do a minimum of three shifts per week there which will top up my pension nicely. There may be the opportunity for even more hours which I will jump at. IF I can all that settled my notice will go in for the school in June.

I need to redo/update my will as things have changed. I also want to plan things so Braeden doesn't have to worry about it. As an only child it will all fall on him so I want to make it as easy as possible.

[HavaDrPepper]

Originally Posted by jaye

I need to redo/update my will as things have changed. I also want to plan things so Braeden doesn't have to worry about it. As an only child it will all fall on him so I want to make it as easy as possible.

As an only child that has gone through the process of losing both parents and dealing with the estate when it came to me, your son will thank you if you have everything set up correctly.

I was set up as a co-owner on my father's bank accounts which made closing those accounts very easy even with us living in 2 different states. Luckily his bank has 1 branch in Ohio which is located about 45 minutes from me.

At the time I was put on his bank account, I also met his investment counselors. They assured both of us that all accounts were set up so that they would transfer easily to me. After he passed, I found out that one account was NOT set up with me as a beneficiary. The one account was and transferred easily. The other account had to go through probate before it could be transferred to me. So I had to deal with the advisors in NC for over a year (and I was not fond of them from that one and only meeting with them). That account also had 2 investments within it (REIT's) that were not transferrable to my accounts as my advisors don't handle REIT accounts. It took forever to get me out of those REIT accounts so I could get everything in my name with my advisor. It is better to have investment accounts set up with a beneficiary so that the courts do not have to get involved.

Believe me, I have all my investment accounts and bank accounts set up with beneficiaries to make the process easier for them. Also, they are set up "per stirpes" which means that if the beneficiary is no longer alive, their children will get their share. And, I have a will.

[LJSDesigns]

Originally Posted by HavaDrPepper

Also, they are set up "per stirpes" which means that if the beneficiary is no longer alive, their children will get their share. And, I have a will.

I have this done as well. Mine even covers who will take care of my animals when I pass and what to do with LJS Designs. At the end of the process, my lawyer gave me a card to give to my son and told me to tell him when I pass, he just needs to call her and she will set everything in motion. I planned my funeral, my burial, everything that could possibly be planned is planned. I also added him to my bank accounts to cover that area as well. I hope that between me and the lawyer, we have made it easy on him. Every time I have lost someone, my husband and my parents, I have ended up paying money for outstanding debt, legal fees, funerals, etc. I even helped my kids with my DIL's mom's funeral because they didn't know there was insurance. Through all of that, I learned that death is not cheap and I don't want my kid to have financial worries on top of everything else.

[LJSDesigns]

Originally Posted by jaye

I also want to plan things so Braeden doesn't have to worry about it. As an only child it will all fall on him so I want to make it as easy as possible.

This is why I did it too. Having experienced it enough myself, I wanted to make sure he did not have all the issues I had. Just getting guardianship of my mom after her last stroke was incredibly hard and costly. Anything that involves the law is seriously expensive. Estate planning costs money too, but it will also save money at the end.

[HavaDrPepper]

Originally Posted by LJSDesigns

I have this done as well. Mine even covers who will take care of my animals when I pass and what to do with LJS Designs. At the end of the process, my lawyer gave me a card to give to my son and told me to tell him when I pass, he just needs to call her and she will set everything in motion. I planned my funeral, my burial, everything that could possibly be planned is planned. I also added him to my bank accounts to cover that area as well. I hope that between me and the lawyer, we have made it easy on him. Every time I have lost someone, my husband and my parents, I have ended up paying money for outstanding debt, legal fees, funerals, etc. I even helped my kids with my DIL's mom's funeral because they didn't know there was insurance. Through all of that, I learned that death is not cheap and I don't want my kid to have financial worries on top of everything else.

Good for you!

My parents pre-planned their funerals the summer of 1996. They thought I'd be mad about it. I said "heck no" that I was always afraid they would get in a huge wreck driving through the mountains on their way to FL every year and both would die at the same time. Being single and no siblings, it scared me. So it was a relief. Then 6 months later, Mom passed away in FL. All Dad and I had to do was call the funeral director in OH and he found a funeral home down there to handle the arrangements. We met with the funeral directors at both places and things went very smooth. Dad lived another 19 years and died in NC. The 2 funeral homes coordinated getting him from there to here for the funeral. Again, I just had to finalize a few things. The insurance basically covered everything except the cost of getting him from NC to OH. For Mom, Dad got a refund.

Back in 2007 when my dad was home on a visit, he went to the funeral home and planned my funeral for me and told me after he did it. Picked out the casket and everything! All Mom had asked of him was to do this for me. In the summer of 2023, when I didn't know what was going on with my heart, I went to the funeral director and changed some of the arrangements (no visitation or public funeral). I even gave him the obituary to post on the funeral home website but not put in the paper since it is so expensive. He said a death mention is free so I OK'd that in the newspaper. I just want a quick graveside service and I have told my family that they can have a good old party after wards... in other words, celebrate my life but don't mourn my passing.