Not today

Translation of the journaling (with Google help lol):

Usually, I'm a pretty positive person and I try hard to see the best in everything, but sometimes I get very angry. This has been pissing me off for a while but now I need to talk about it.

To start, yes I am a stay-at-home mom and no I don't do anything with my days...
I can't stand these cliches that the "workers" have of us, of me without even knowing me.

My mom was a stay-at-home mom too, all my life I've heard her answer the question, "what's your job?" " : "I don't work" !
Already as a little girl it shocked me! What my mother doesn't work? But she does not stop all day!
Today I am the stay-at-home mom. Not necessarily for the same reasons because for me it is imposed.

I hate hasty judgments and the cliches in which I am locked up!
I hate these innocuous little sentences: "oh but you don't work, you have lot of time" or "imagine the classes closed with the Covid for working parents" implied "you don't do anything, you don't have nothing to do than taking care of your kids".


No, I don't spend my days in front of the television snacking, no, I don't read tons of novels, no, I don't scrap all day... No, none of that!
I have had OCD for a long time just like my mother and I spend a lot of time tidying up, cleaning, preparing food, making beds, washing and ironing clothes and especially making sure my children are in a place where they feel good. It's gotten worse since I've been home but it's still my problem.
I don't impose it on anyone, I never talk about it.
When you're a stay-at-home mom, you have to take care of everyone, there's no sick leave, no vacations... It's often repetitive.
Let things be clear, yes I like to take care of my children, I may be a mother hen, sometimes even a "Jewish mother" and I totally assume that!
Tired of people, especially those who don't have children, who tell me that I should take time for myself and take care of my children less. Being a single mom it's difficult but above all I don't want it more than that. I like being with my children, I didn't have them to be separated from them permanently. I will probably not have other children, they are unique and I am delighted to have this chance to take care of them.
They have special needs and I am happy to be able to support them.


Yes sometimes I miss not having more of a social life but if it's to hear this kind of reflection, I prefer to be alone. Each time, I feel frustrated, angry, I can't answer what I really think and each time I ruminate.
My parents raised me not to judge others and I pass this on to my children.
It would never occur to me to blame a mother who works and sees her children very little, so why do these people take this right to judge me?
Why should I justify my choices, my health?
Because yes when there is Covid at school, I worry for my children even if they are vaccinated but also for me because I suffer from comorbidities, I am obese, I have heart problems and I take medication for this. So no, I'm not an elderly person, neither pregnant, nor with a lot of pathologies, but yes, I have problems too.
Why won't I have the right to express myself, to complain sometimes when I don't feel well? No I don't always smile, no I don't always feel happy and I have the right! Yes, there are worse situations, that's for sure, but I also have the right to feel emotions, I'm just human.
No one will put me down anymore, no one will tell me that I'm not enough.
I am as I am, I do not force anyone to love me and I will not change!
I want to be accepted as I am and above all no longer judged, I don't have to report to anyone.
Now I'm going to cut ties with these harmful people, I won't lose anything, quite the contrary.

Wow, this is not only visually stunning but I can feel the anger in your word with having to deal with this all your life. I hope this page brought you some good scrap therapy.

Oh sweetie! I am so sorry this is happening to you and you feel this way.
You are you and you are the best person you can be! You are beautiful on the inside and outside. You are a wonderful mom, a beautiful lady. Don't let anyone ever tell you anything different.
I love your layout though. Even though it is a hard and honest journal, your layout is gorgeous. I can feel your emotions. I can feel your pain.
I hope scrapping this layout worked therapeutic for you.
Hugs to you! :wub:

Hi sweetie,
Thank you for your kind message.
I am home on maternity leave right now. Monday was my last day at work. But it has been hard last week. I suddenly had a tooth ache and I was in pain for three days, esp. since I can't take any medication. Luckily my dentist is super sweet and I was able to see her on a short notice.
It was super busy at work as well. I had to turn over my work to two co-workers. And on Tuesday, someone new started who is going to take over my work until I go back. So I had a lot of explaining to do and finish the work I started.
But I am at home now and I can finally rest a little. Just 1,5 week until my due date!
How are you doing? How are your kids doing? Did they have a great holiday?
Hope you are all okay!
Lots of love! :wub:

I'm so sorry that other people have made you feel this way. I hope that you got some relief from putting your thoughts down on the page. A little scrap therapy. Hugs. And such a visually stunning page. You really did a great job creating the mood!

Ca s'appelle un ingenieur domestique! haha la plus belle invention de nom de carriere je trouve. Tu n'as qu'a dire ca a partir de maintenant haha

Je suis desole que les gens soient plein de prejuges. Moi aussi je suis stay at home mom and je sais bien que ce n'est pas du repos.

Bizaremment je pensais que tu etais infirmiere. Je ne sais pas pourquoi.

En tout cas ta page est sublime!!

Et oui je fais ma galette maison tous les ans. En general j'en fait une apres l'autre car je les devore! J'adore tout ce qui est base de poudre d'amande. Financiers, galette des rois... miam!

WOW your page is amazing! I appreciate the translation - and I totally agree. I stayed home with my kids when they were young and then only worked part time until now. People judge both ways and even working part time I get flack from both sides LOL People! Your page is visually stunning and poignant. I hope it provided you some scrap therapy (no pun intended). I am also a proud Jewish mother but really I am. xoxo

I love therapeutic pages....I think we need them. I am glad you were able to get your thoughts down.
Please know....NO ONE's OPINION of what you do MATTERS except those babies.
I was a SAHM for many years and I always hated that too, but hubby and the kids loved it and that's all that mattered.
HUGS!!!!
This page and YOU as a mom are

People absolutely have to do what right for them and their family. There is no right or wrong, just what's right for you! The world would be a very boring place if we all did things the same way! I never pass judgment on people based on whether they've chosen to be a working parent or SAHP.

Anyway, I love how your page design turned out! Hopefully it was cathartic to scrap about this topic. Big hugs!

Just to say a big THANK YOU ladies for your comments. I hesitate to post this layout at first because I don't often scrap my feelings. I wrote it first as I often do but most of the time I stop there but this time I feel the need to scrap it and publish it just to help me laying the things done and I'm so surprise at how it helps me.
I'm not angry all the time but it was a weight for me and I feel lighter to have scrapping it! Your comments just touched me so much you can't imagine! Thank you so much for sharing your experience and telling me these kind words, I'm thankful from the heart bottom!
I think I'm gonna make new ones later!

I'll come back to leave you some love too but again Thank you so much! It's great to have such a supportive community! :wub: